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Horse_eBooks Is Dead, So Here Are Some Other Surreal Twitter Feeds to Comfort You

As you know, I am a full time internet.

horse_ebooks

Probably the saddest thing about yesterday’s horse_ebooks reveal — that the Twitter account once thought to be an automated spambot was actually a curated performance art project — is that we won’t be getting any more of its random-yet-sometimes-profound nonsensical tweets. So what should you fill your with feed now? Here are our humble suggestions.

 

big ben clock

@big_ben_clock

One of the oldest one-note Twitter accounts, @big_ben_clock bongs on the hour every hour according to the time in England.

This is also the only Twitter account on our list that’s even remotely informative. It tells you the time! That’s something, right?

coffee dad

@coffee_dad

@Coffee_dad is just a dad who really enjoys his coffee. And who harbors a lot of deep, dark secrets beneath those playfully bad tweets.

 

burlcoat

@burlcoatfactory

The Burlington Coat Factory does not have an official brand Twitter page. Instead it has this, which started out looking like a regular brand Twitter feed and then got progressively weirder and weirder:

No, seriously.

It got really weird.

It was so convincing at first that Burlington Coat Factory itself accidentally linked to it one time, but recently we’ve all come to appreciate it as the surrealist masterpiece that it really is.

 

hostile goose

@hostile_goose

Probably the closest in feel to @horse_ebooks we’re ever going to get, @hostile_goose is… well. It is.

— goose (@hostile_goose) August 9, 2013

 

sales speak

@Sales_Speak  

What if @horse_ebooks were tangentially about business related matters? That’s where @sales_speak comes in (in fact, it was origially called @salesman_ebooks).

 

babbytip

@babbytip

How does babby form? We don’t know. @babbytips probably doesn’t know, either. But it’s still full of some great advice for your little babbys.

As well as some speculation about the true nature of the babby, of course.

birdrights

@probirdrights

A commentary on social media activists? A parody  of reactionary politics? A hilarious gag about a bird not being able to type? Bird Rights Activist is all these things and more. So, so much more.

Checkmate, indeed.

upworthit

@UpWorthIt

In the same vein as @probirdrights, @UpWorthIt parodies the weirdly dramatic linkbait headlines of the now multi-million dollar company, Upworthy.

 

carrot facts

@RealCarrotFacts

Last but not least, everything you’ve ever wanted to know about carrots packaged in bite-sized pieces. You know, just like baby carrots or something.

(via Twitter)

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