Donald Trump adjusts a microphone and glares from a podium.

Trump Announces Presidential Bid, My Computer Screen Now Covered in Puke

Forgive any typos in this article, since my screen is now spray-painted in vomit. Donald Trump has officially announced his 2024 presidential bid, you see, and I couldn’t keep my dinner down.

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Trump, who devoted his 2016-2020 term as president to stoking racial hatred in the US and enabling the rise of white supremacist fascism, announced his candidacy in a statement at 9 PM eastern time. “America’s comeback starts right now,” he said, peppering his speech with bigoted propaganda and false claims.

“Three years ago, when I left office, the US stood ready for its golden age. The nation was at the pinnacle of power, towering over all rivals and vanquishing all enemies …. We were a great and glorious nation, something you haven’t heard for a long time.” Trump also mentioned a “globalist” (that is, Jewish) conspiracy, called US cities “cesspools of violent crimes,” and said immigrants had “flooded” the US with fentanyl.

“In order to make American great and glorious again,” Trump said, “I am tonight announcing my candidacy for President of the United States.”

In the hours leading up to the expected announcement, the general feeling of dread and disgust was peppered with speculation on whether Trump might be arrested during his announcement. The House Committee investigating the January 6, 2021 insurrection recently subpoenaed Trump, after concluding that there was evidence that he mislead the American people about the 2020 election results, tried to overturn the election, and orchestrated the insurrection.

So what happens now that Trump has announced his candidacy for a second term?

The best case scenario is that he’ll go back to dominating every news cycle, spreading more false claims about election fraud and who knows what else, until he’s defeated by the Democratic candidate in 2024. (Biden hasn’t announced his own bid yet, and is reportedly still deciding whether or not to run.)

The worst case scenario? Trump wins, and the US continues its plummet into full-blown Christian fascism. During his time as president—excuse me, I just vomited some more at the memory—Trump stuffed federal courts, including the Supreme Court, with far-right extremist judges. He instituted a travel ban on people from predominantly Muslim countries, stoked anti-Latinx sentiment by blathering for years about his fabled border wall, and directly caused the deaths of thousands of Puerto Ricans with his botched response to Hurricane Maria.

Voting is far from a cure-all when you’re dealing with fascists and extremists, but it does shape the landscape of the battles we have to fight. If you want to make sure Trump doesn’t ooze his way back into the White House in 2024, make sure your voter registration is up to date, and consider phone-banking or canvassing for his opponent, whoever that might be.

At the very least, do it so that we don’t all have to listen to his voice all the time for the next few years. All our screens deserve to be vomit-free.

(featured image: Brandon Bell/Getty Images)


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Julia Glassman
Julia Glassman (she/her) holds an MFA from the Iowa Writers' Workshop, and has been covering feminism and media since 2007. As a staff writer for The Mary Sue, Julia covers Marvel movies, folk horror, sci fi and fantasy, film and TV, comics, and all things witchy. Under the pen name Asa West, she's the author of the popular zine 'Five Principles of Green Witchcraft' (Gods & Radicals Press). You can check out more of her writing at <a href="https://juliaglassman.carrd.co/">https://juliaglassman.carrd.co/.</a>