We are well aware of the history of r/AmItheAsshole and whether the AITA posts are real or not, but a new one is … a lot to unpack, and even if it isn’t real, there are plenty of people out there who think this way and it’s dangerous. Basically, it’s just a classic tale of men thinking they have any kind of say over someone else’s body. A user wanted to know if she was the asshole for yelling at her husband for throwing away an entire box of tampons not once, but twice.
Let that sink in. This man wasted (let’s say) $20 because, apparently, he felt uncomfortable with her using tampons—without even providing any reason for why he felt uncomfortable, though it’s not like the reason would matter. I am sorry, but no one should frankly have a say over how anyone else with a period chooses to handle it! It’s not their concern!
The author of the post (above) said she was able to finally use tampons after being previously unable for medical reasons, and said it was easier for her to use them and made her periods easier, but her husband felt uncomfortable with her using them and thought simply saying that was enough reason for her to stop using them. I’m sorry, but I would simply have that man sit with a pad on for an hour and then ask him if he’d do it for days.
A lot of the responses on the post point out that the husband might not like tampons because it is a “foreign” object being inserted into his wife, and I am sorry, but if your ego is that fragile, you have a lot bigger issues to work through.
The use of tampons is at the discretion of the one with the period only
The issue here is that this man thinks he has any kind say over what someone with a period should do with their own body. It’s not rare, and it is something we’ve seen in our politics time and time again because men (particularly men in power) love to hold that power over someone else’s bodily autonomy. That’s what this is about: power.
It’d be one thing for him to even bring up his uncomfortable feeling. It’s frankly none of his business, but just mentioning it wouldn’t be as bad. Taking the tampons and getting rid of them then makes it very clear that his feelings and his ideas about his wife’s body are more important to him than how she feels.
And that’s dangerous. That mindset is what has put women down for centuries and made outrageous laws about what we can and cannot do with our own bodies. The idea that a man can take action to get rid of something that we need to take care of periods and make a choice for what is best for a husband’s comfort? That’s something that shouldn’t be tolerated.
So no, OP. You’re not the asshole. And your husband owes you two boxes of tampons, maybe should go get some therapy, and owes you one hell of an apology. You also should probably get out of there because what in the horror story is this man’s deal?
(image: NBC)
