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I Don’t Know Anything About Stocks but the GameStop Memes Are Good

BEE's new book gets scathing review Christian Bale in American Psycho (2000)

What I know about the stock market I’ve learned from things like American Psycho and The Wolf of Wall Street. So basically I know there are business cards, suits, and drugs. That’s it. So imagine my shock and awe when I logged on to Twitter today to see a lot of jargon about stocks, the economy, and GameStop on my timeline.

Luckily, our Jessica Mason knows way more than me about the stock market and wrote up what’s happening. You could explain it to me ten times over and I’d still just hear Huey Lewis and the News playing in the distance.

But at least I’m not alone. Everyone is making jokes. Do you guys also not understand anything happening? Like … why was this not taught in school for this exact moment? You’d think when they explained that the stock market crash caused the Great Depression that they’d explain it, but … nope. I just imagine that all the numbers said “we out” and left, and that’s what happened. I want to participate in this discussion or understand if I should be spending money to own AMC. (Is that how this works? Do you own the thing? I truly don’t have a clue.)

Anyway, this is my contribution to all of this.

I’ll never understand stocks, and I think I’m okay with that. You guys go have your fun and all own GameStop locations or a specific seat in the AMC of your choosing. Again, I don’t know what any of this means. I’m just assuming.

(image: Lionsgate)

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