There were so many things I loved about Star Wars: The Last Jedi, not the least of which was the joy I got watching Kylo Ren whine and moan his way through the entire movie. No spoilers here, but it should not be a spoiler by now to hear that Kyo Ren is a whiny-ass bitch.
Throughout the entire movie, every time young Ben whined at anyone, my mind kept returning to my very favorite thing to come out of The Force Awakens: the Emo Kylo Ren Twitter account.
*comes to school after a three-day weekend* my name isn't Ben any more it's KYLO REN and i'm a dark knight
— Emo Kylo Ren (@KyloR3n) December 21, 2015
If you somehow missed this account the first time around, I am jealous of the rabbit hole you’re about to go down.
The account manages to mock everything mockable about the character. It captures Kylo’s general hipstery perma-mope.
you can't truly appreciate the imperial march until you hear it on vinyl
— Emo Kylo Ren (@KyloR3n) December 22, 2015
But it also dives into deeper issues, all while remaining succinctly hilarious. It addresses Ren’s anti-Rey MRA pathetic-ness.
*hands Rey an xbox controller* it's cool if you don't beat it the first try
i didn't
you have to really learn and practice
*rey beats it*— Emo Kylo Ren (@KyloR3n) December 22, 2015
It also embraces a larger misogyny, and a deeper darkness.
i just don't think girls GET why darth vader is so great
— Emo Kylo Ren (@KyloR3n) December 22, 2015
In fact, it attacks this specific type of moody, entitled, MRA internet culture sort of dude head-on. And it ties it specifically to the issues the rest of us face every day.
it's about ethics in Force journalism
— Emo Kylo Ren (@KyloR3n) December 22, 2015
dear diary
hux loaned me his copy of mein kampf
he loves it but i thought it was a HUGE disappointment
no mentions of Darth Vader AT ALL— Emo Kylo Ren (@KyloR3n) December 22, 2015
heritage not hate pic.twitter.com/Lt9jRHfVbh
— Emo Kylo Ren (@KyloR3n) December 22, 2015
This Twitter account is absolutely one of the–if not the–best things to come out of The Force Awakens, and I’ve been lightly obsessed with it since its launch.
But I didn’t know until just last week that the brainforce behind the account is the brilliant political satirist Alexandra Petri, one of my very favorite brains on the entire internet, and pretty much the person that sold me on my Washington Post subscription.
I spent much of TLJ wanting to revisit this account, and I’m glad to see that Petri has reactivated it to meet the undying emo Ren demand.
dear diary
there have been some changes— Emo Kylo Ren (@KyloR3n) December 15, 2017
yes i’m a monster
but have you considered that the real monster might be society— Emo Kylo Ren (@KyloR3n) December 16, 2017
i want to put my fist through this whole lousy beautiful star system
— Emo Kylo Ren (@KyloR3n) December 16, 2017
hey girl am i a Death Star
because i feel like you should keep trying to rebuild me in spite of my obvious flaws and the lives i’ve destroyed— Emo Kylo Ren (@KyloR3n) December 17, 2017
This. Is. Art.
(image: Lucasfilm/Disney/Photoshop)
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