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Republicans on the Debt Ceiling: We’ve Tried Nothing and We’re All Out of Ideas

Well, this is terrifying.

House Majority Leader Kevin McCarthy resting his weary head on his fingertips.

So here’s the thing about electing fascists who also happen to be absolutely incompetent to power: eventually, they can’t kick the can down the road anymore, and at some point, they do have to do their Constitutionally-mandated jobs. Yes, friends, I’m talking about the House Republicans and the debt ceiling, and they are in quite the pickle because the United States government hit the ceiling back in January, and it’s only because the Treasury has taken “extraordinary measures” (which last through June 5) that we haven’t really felt the pinch.

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Why are we in this position in the first place? The Republicans refuse to raise the “debt ceiling” (which has been permanently raised 78 times since 1960 alone! It’s not a big deal and only becomes a partisan issue when it’s weaponized as a bargaining chip) without “promises of spending cuts.” What do you need to even make spending cuts? A budget, but hold on to that thought!

This is a ticking time bomb, which is set to go off at some point between July and September of this year, according to the Congressional Budget Office, when the U.S. Government will default on its debt. Defaulting is very, very bad and will most likely impact you, an American citizen, directly, per The White House:

Financial markets would lose faith in the United States, the dollar would weaken, and stocks would fall. The U.S. credit rating would almost certainly be downgraded, and interest rates would broadly rise for many consumer loans, making products like auto loans and mortgages more expensive for families who are subject to interest rate changes or taking out new loans. These and other consequences could trigger a recession and a credit market freeze that could hurt the ability of American companies to operate.

Sounds fun, right? So. Republicans have a plan for all of this, right? Right?

LOL. Of course not! This is Republican House Majority Leader Kevin McCarthy we’re talking about, baby! He’s just happy to be in power, trolling the Democrats, and getting on TV! You know better than to think the Republicans want to actually govern, by now, surely? Per CNBC:

“We’ve made no progress,” the California Republican told CNBC’s “Squawk Box.” “I’m always an optimist. I’m not now.”

[…]

“Time is ticking,” McCarthy said in the interview. “Now I’m very concerned about where we are.”

They just know they don’t want what the Democrats want, despite that they’ve objected to accusations that they want to cut Social Security and Medicare, not giving them much in the way of their own options to meaningfully reduce spending—almost like the over-spending they keep talking about is imaginary! Do you think the party that took 15 rounds of voting to elect a speaker of the House, and then clapped as if they just put a man on the Moon in the most embarrassing way possible, is unified on what it wants? This is what happens when you just elect obstructionists who hate the same people you hate, instead of trying to be a better person or wanting what’s best for your country. We’re screwed!

The Democrats see this for the slow-moving, incompetent car crash for what it is, and aren’t taking it lying down. Per CNBC:

“It’s time for Republicans to stop playing games, agree to … pass a clean debt ceiling bill, and quit threatening to wreak havoc on our economy,” White House press secretary Karine Jean-Pierre said in response to McCarthy on Tuesday. “And if they want to have a conversation about our nation’s economic and fiscal future, it’s time for them to put out a budget.”

Biden has released his budget. It’s written down! It clearly spells out his administration’s objectives. Highlights include “a 25% minimum tax on the richest Americans, among other levies, to cut the deficit by $3 trillion over the next decade.” Now I think you know where this is going. Have the House Republicans released theirs? Absolutely not! Not even one scribbled on the back of a greasy napkin, or just the Biden budget with his numbers adjusted to be lower.

To be clear, the Biden administration released its budget on March 9. That was almost three weeks ago. Even if you did no homework up until then, surely you could have an intern redline that budget and release your own in response? But nooooo, that would get in the way of going on news shows and doing nothing, I guess.

Well, here’s your answer, in plain black and white. According to Kevin McCarthy, the budget has nothing to do with the default. Excuse me, what? Yes, that is in direct contradiction to what Republicans have been saying all along. What are facts when you can troll?

To translate partisanship, this monster will run our entire economy off a cliff to stick it to the Democrats and Joe Biden because 2024 is a presidential election year, and he doesn’t care. Also, he’s a lazy dolt, so this is kind of a two-fer so he won’t have to do the job he ran 15 times to get.

The only saving grace is that I do like to think the Democrats know exactly what McCarthy is doing because he’s operating with the subtlety of a toddler stealing cookies left out on the counter. I guess we’re about to find out in the most terrifying way possible who will win this game of chicken, with the entire country’s economic wellbeing on the line. Fun times!

(featured image: Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images)

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Author
Kate Hudson
Kate Hudson (no, not that one) has been writing about pop culture and reality TV in particular for six years, and is a Contributing Writer at The Mary Sue. With a deep and unwavering love of Twilight and Con Air, she absolutely understands her taste in pop culture is both wonderful and terrible at the same time. She is the co-host of the popular Bravo trivia podcast Bravo Replay, and her favorite Bravolebrity is Kate Chastain, and not because they have the same first name, but it helps.

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