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Everyone’s Already Making Fun Of The Star Wars Trailer Lightsaber Because Of Course They Are


By now we’re guessing all of you have sat down and watched the Star Wars: The Force Awakens trailer that dropped on iTunes today. Think back to those glorious 88 seconds. What was your reaction when the Sith Lord unleashed his (or her, shhhhh let me dream it was Lupita) lightsaber and it looked like… well, this?

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(via Imgur)

Yup, the reactions to the new cross-bladed lightsaber run the gamut; on the one hand, it looks like an awesome scifi broadsword, and a crossguard makes a cursory amount of sense for protecting your thumbs against other lightsabers. On the other hand, as the master bladesmith that the Washington Post has already interviewed tells us, there’s a reason crossguards on actual swords aren’t also made of blades, which is that having those near your thumbs is a bad idea in the first place.

On the other other hand, we’re talking about a fictional sword made out of impossible light plasma from a science fantasy franchise that heavily features the use of telekinesis to solve your problems. So maybe let’s all keep things in perspective, here.


But regardless what position you take in #sabergate (oh God wait no please don’t start using that, even ironically, I’m sorry I even came up with it what have I done), you have to admit that poking fun at Star Wars is a time honored American tradition, and one that the Internet has thrust itself into with great aplomb:

(Whoops, so much for the handguard theory—unless it’s made of resistant cortosis material?)

And my personal favorite,

I don’t think I’m speaking out of turn when I say that the general Mary Sue staff consensus appears to be somewhere on the “it looks neat” to “who cares if it’s implausible YOU’RE IMPLAUSIBLE” spectrum. What do you think?

Previously in STAR WARS

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