Something that folks like to ask every now and then is who they would want to narrate their life. After taking a second to bless myself with Leslie Jones’ Twitter feed I can say, with great confidence, that she’s got my inner monologue down to a science. The actress/comedian/host of the way too charming Supermarket Sweep took to Twitter to record her reactions to several hours worth of MSNBC news segments, and lord, if these aren’t the most accurate reactions to … well … *gestures about wildly*
Trust me when I say that there is a LOT to take in so I suggest going to her Twitter account, settling down with a fresh cup of coffee, reclining back, and watching the commentary. I’m gonna share some of my favorites here but please, don’t stop at these picks. There’s a reason why she’s trending.
- Mitch McConnell’s still here huh?
Warning: there’s a delightful amount of profanity beautifully strung together over the audacity of his existence. Also something about (censoring) him with a big (censored) with no vaseline. Just wanted to prepare you for that imagery.
I said what I said!! #fuckem pic.twitter.com/Qb8mDXTFvT
— Leslie Jones 🦋 (@Lesdoggg) December 3, 2020
This is truly something my brain does when it’s so frustrated with someone that instead of finishing the sentence I just start belting out profanities. There’s truly nothing else to say in regards to how heinous Mitch McConnell is so yeah… swear jar it up.
- Send Leslie them books!
I mean, it is a nice setup. Damn, I miss bookstores, y’all.
Wow to the fucking wow!! Yo send me that “street players” book you don’t need it!! You got all the books!! pic.twitter.com/atjqrJ0JhB
— Leslie Jones 🦋 (@Lesdoggg) December 3, 2020
I hope she saw that Eddie’s willing to send her whatever she wants!
This is hilarious. I got you. Whatever you want!
— Eddie S. Glaude Jr. (@esglaude) December 3, 2020
- This HGTV moment
Emily Jane Fox (say all three names) is killing the game with this backsplash. How are you so stylish in the middle of a pandemic?
Now this is pleasant!! pic.twitter.com/4guE7BdL9A
— Leslie Jones 🦋 (@Lesdoggg) December 3, 2020
Is the kitchen always this flawless or has it been cleaned for company?
- Defund the police
After giving Maya Wiley all of the flowers, Jones talks about what defunding the police means.
“Should not get caught up in slogans get caught up in solutions” I heard you sis!! Now answer my question!! pic.twitter.com/U0NeeooFkf
— Leslie Jones 🦋 (@Lesdoggg) December 3, 2020
Much like phrases like white privilege people get caught up in the slogan instead of examining what it means. While Jones says that she personally feels that reform may have been a better word, she breaks down (in just a few seconds) what folks mean when they say defund the police and why it’s necessary. I appreciate it being a quick explanation akin to my mother when she’s tired of explaining something for the umpteenth time. At some point, it’s willful ignorance, and Jones clearly has no time for that.
- When you find out someone you thought you knew supported Trump
Not Geraldo!
What the actual FUCK?! I never knew!! pic.twitter.com/OjAqdWbqKy
— Leslie Jones 🦋 (@Lesdoggg) December 3, 2020
This is exactly how I felt in 2016 when certain people who I thought I knew voted for Trump. I thought I removed the nonsense out of my life, but then I felt this frustration AGAIN when certain people who I thought I knew tried to shame me for not “taking the high road” when Trump lost because “we should all come together.”
I’m too done to cut off anyone’s mustache, but I’ll gladly gift wrap an electric razor for Leslie Jones to use as she sees fit.
- Best. Face. Ever.
Best face EVER!! Don Lemon ladies abs gentlemen!! pic.twitter.com/Qox9bxIYnJ
— Leslie Jones 🦋 (@Lesdoggg) December 3, 2020
We all have a reaction specifically reserved for Trump, but is it Don Lemon levels of done? Is it “I don’t get paid enough to deal with this” levels of done?
- You are so f*cking embarrassing!
This is FUCKING EMBARRASSING!! pic.twitter.com/8fszMT8pbm
— Leslie Jones 🦋 (@Lesdoggg) December 3, 2020
I’m ending my list here because this perfectly encapsulates what I’ve been feeling for a long time. I remember, at the beginning of Trump’s presidency, talking with my mom and her saying that it felt like we were in some weird, parallel universe, because how did so many people think that THIS was who we needed in office? I get that our country has been a mess since its inception, if we’re being real honest with ourselves, but not only did folks willingly put Donald “I scream so much misinformation that Twitter constantly disputes it” Trump in office, many were willing to do it again!
Just … I’m not sure embarrassing covers the full scope of this, but it’s as close as we can get.
All of the thanks to Leslie Jones for putting this all out there. Please, Ms. Jones, watch something soothing for the remainder of the week.
(Image: Paras Griffin/Stringer)
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