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Dang, The Rock Can’t Even Joke About Which Superhero Could Beat Who Without Being Asked If He’s Green Lantern

Fact From the Vapor of Nuance

You may be hearing that Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson is up for the role of John Stewart, Green Lantern of Earth. I am here to tell you that he’s really very probably not.

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Ok, so what happened was that his Rockness sent out a nice instagram post about an old friend of his, and now even The Hollywood Reporter is talking about how it means he’s in talks with Warner Bros. Really. Here’s what he said:

Known [Hiram Garcia] since he was 15. I was on the football field playing for Miami, he was leading the Hurricanes marching band as Drum Major. He spent years of working on my WWE story lines & Rock monologues. Then years of being on every movie set with me learning the film business from top to bottom. Today, he’s one of the best and most sought after producers in Hollywood. Brilliant, relentless and one big motherf*cker! Proud of you brother & thank you for all the hard work. #ProducerHiram #TeamRock #JohnStewartCanStillWhupSupermansAss

Look. I know that an actor of color rumored to be in talks with Warner Bros. just hashtagged a post with the words “John Stewart.” But it’s also very clear that this is a case of Johnson sharing an old inside joke with a long-time friend. He has known Hiram Garcia more than a quarter of a century. Garcia is credited as his assistant on some of his films. Johnson used to be married to Garcia’s sister. Garcia is a producer with Hollywood connections, but not on any movies made by Warner Bros. And when the fan machine started churning Johnson’s friendly post into rumor, he seemed more bewildered than cagey, frankly:

This is what nerds do, folks. We have longstanding arguments with our oldest friends in which we hold opposing viewpoints on entirely trivial matters and we would rather eat glass than admit the other person’s viewpoint and we will never miss a point to tell them that they’re wrong. Heck, by those standards, I’m rumored to be playing the Question in Batman vs. Superman.

Seriously, though, can I play the Question in Batman vs. Superman?

(via The Hollywood Reporter.)

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Susana Polo
Susana Polo thought she'd get her Creative Writing degree from Oberlin, work a crap job, and fake it until she made it into comics. Instead she stumbled into a great job: founding and running this very website (she's Editor at Large now, very fancy). She's spoken at events like Geek Girl Con, New York Comic Con, and Comic Book City Con, wants to get a Batwoman tattoo and write a graphic novel, and one of her canine teeth is in backwards.

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