Donald Trump Is Right About California. Yeah. That’s Exactly How Droughts Work.
I don’t know why we’re all making fun of the president. What he said on Hannity about giving all the water in California to the tiny little fishes is exactly what I used to do when I lived in California. I’d take buckets of water from Castaic Lake, and I’d drive to the Pacific ocean every weekend with my family to make sure that Nemo and his friends had water. It’s called CARING ABOUT THE FISH. Or else the evil Pacific Ocean Queen would rise up and gut the fishes right before our very eyes.
Just to be clear, that is not actually how anything works.
Last night, Donald Trump went on Hannity, and truly this is a 2-minute clip of pure nonsense where he … I guess tries to explain California’s drought?
“California is gonna have to ration water. You wanna know why? Because they send millions of gallons of water out to sea, out to the Pacific. Because they want to take care of certain little tiny fish, that aren’t doing very well without water.” — Trump pic.twitter.com/g0PrXZRgOq
— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) October 9, 2020
As someone who grew up in California, I remember this clearly. One time, I brought a jellyfish a pepperoni roll. He said thank you and then slithered off back to sea only to return every ten years looking for his next pepperoni roll.
In all seriousness, this is just too funny. Like … yeah, it’s terrifying that that man is our president, but he just insinuated that there isn’t water in California because they’re giving it to the Pacific ocean. If you seriously want to vote for that man, I will always laugh in your face.
So, Twitter decided it was time to admit that we do, in fact, sacrifice the water supply in California to appease the Pacific Ocean Queen. (Her name is Nicole Kidman and Jason Momoa is her son.)
it’s true every night we all take buckets of water to the beach and dump them in the ocean in service to our waterless fish gods https://t.co/GmLlx6PSyb
— shauna (@goldengateblond) October 9, 2020
I won’t be on Twitter much today, because according to the rota it’s my turn to take water out into the ocean, to help certain tiny little fish, that aren’t doing well without water, despite being… literally in the water. It’s special water. Okay, it’s soup. For the tiny fish. https://t.co/ZnGoeoUNi5
— Michael Marshall Smith (@ememess) October 9, 2020
— torey✿ (@torrrreyy) October 9, 2020
To quote my friend @AshBenzo: R U OKAY?!
Little tiny fish?! Bitch wut?! HE’S UNWELL. https://t.co/VglxcpYkrP
— Kevin McHale (@druidDUDE) October 9, 2020
SEND HIM TO SHADY PINES https://t.co/eguOnXwvWp
— Ben Yahr (@benyahr) October 9, 2020
Someone please draw me a little tiny fish happily drinking a giant glass of water. I need it.
— Ashley Nicole Black (@ashleyn1cole) October 9, 2020
Here ya go pic.twitter.com/Qp7zqKyrw3
— Carrie Negosonic Preaged Warhead Coffee (@MNConundrum) October 9, 2020
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