Clinton Campaign Thinks We Can “Handle the Truth” on Space Aliens; This Election Is Bonkers

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Why let the Republicans have all the “fun”? The Democratic side of the 2016 presidential race sees their “ranting, incoherent baby-hand man” level of weirdness and counters with some space aliens—can’t build any walls to keep them out, can we? This isn’t the first we’ve heard from Hillary Clinton’s campaign on aliens, and boy do I hope it’s not the last as her campaign chair insists the American people can handle the truth. I want to live in a world where political candidates run on a platform of truth about space aliens. Did I say, “Bonkers”? I meant, “This election is the best.”

That’d be John Podesta, also a former senior Obama advisor who once expressed regret that he couldn’t get us the truth then. So, CNN’s Jake Tapper asked Podesta about aliens and Area 51 again yesterday and got probably exactly the levels of X-Files he was hoping for in return as Podesta responded, “If [Hillary’s] elected president and she gets into office, she’ll ask for as many records as the United States federal government has to be declassified. I think that’s a commitment she intends to keep, and that I intend to hold her to.”

Podesta wouldn’t say whether or not he personally knew what was in the records he’d like released either from his time with Obama or working for Bill Clinton’s administration, but he continued on that we could, indeed, handle the truth: “The U.S. government could do a much better job in answering the quite legitimate questions that people have about what’s going on with unidentified aerial phenomena. The American people can handle the truth.”

On one hand, if there really are records of alien encounters that would shed light on anything, I’m all for the public getting their hands on those. On the other, if the documents Podesta wants released would raise as many questions as they answer or more—or if they turn out not to answer any questions at all—that could be exactly the reason that no one has thought the American people should be aware of them yet. I’d like to point him towards the wisdom of one of the most important documents on aliens in human history:

Tommy Lee Jones tells Will Smith that individuals are smart but groups are dumb in Men in Black

(via Uproxx, image via Fox)

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Dan Van Winkle
Dan Van Winkle (he) is an editor and manager who has been working in digital media since 2013, first at now-defunct <em>Geekosystem</em> (RIP), and then at <em>The Mary Sue</em> starting in 2014, specializing in gaming, science, and technology. Outside of his professional experience, he has been active in video game modding and development as a hobby for many years. He lives in North Carolina with Lisa Brown (his wife) and Liz Lemon (their dog), both of whom are the best, and you will regret challenging him at <em>Smash Bros.</em>