Don’t Let Chris Evans Shave Your Dog
Thoughts and prayers go to Dodger Evans during this difficult time.
We’re lucky that Chris Evans grows an impressive beard, because shaving is not his strong suit. Right now, dog owners are realizing just how much they rely on going to the groomer, because they’re now forced to clip their dogs’ nails and give them haircuts in ways they never did before. What that means is that these poor dogs are now subjected to their owners … abilities, and we’ve now learned that Chris Evans will never be a dog groomer.
Sorry to dog lover Chris Evans.
Chris Evans took to Twitter to share the haircut he gave Dodger. He also shared it to Instagram, but we’ll get to that after. The picture is a beautiful picture of Dodger, as Evans always shares, but when you look closely, you can tell that our poor star, our beautiful pup now has bald spots because Chris just tried his best, and sometimes your best isn’t enough.
I assured him I knew what I was doing. He seemed skeptical at first, but with the help of a few treats, I talked him into it.
It went so wrong, so fast. I guess some things are better left to the professionals.
(He hasn’t seen a mirror yet. I told him it looks great) pic.twitter.com/uooHwtmgH3
— Chris Evans (@ChrisEvans) May 4, 2020
I said “We’ll get to it later” about Instagram because new user Chris Evans is still trying to figure it all out, which means he hasn’t figured out the ability to expand your picture yet, let alone figuring out how to add borders to your pictures. So what we got was a square cut of Dodger, meaning … Evans cropped his dog’s head out of the picture.
View this post on Instagram
I assured him I knew what I was doing. He seemed skeptical at first, but with the help of a few treats, I talked him into it. It went so wrong, so fast. I guess some things are better left to the professionals. (He hasn’t seen a mirror yet. I told him it looks great) #Quarantinelife
(He’s learning. We have to be nice. He’s had a hard go of Instagram. First he posted a tree with no caption and then deleted it, and now he’s cropping off his dog’s head. He’s evolving!)
Twitter had some things to say, mainly in Dodger’s honor.
— sam (@samillamends) May 4, 2020
this is why you need to leave his coat longer!!! bring back fluffy dodger!!
— rachel tolleson (@copperinsides) May 4, 2020
Dodger when he finally sees a mirror: pic.twitter.com/ea081Gp7Sx
— Chris Evans as Golden Retrievers (@retrievans) May 4, 2020
What this all means though is … stars: They’re just like us! And they’re trying to cope with their pets needing things and not being able to provide. So maybe Chris Evans should put down the razor (for both himself and Dodger, because Chris, let your hair grow for me, please) and just wait a little while because now when Dodger finally does see his reflection, he’s going to have some things to say. Should you maybe put Dodger’s Knives Out sweater on him?
— Chris Evans (@ChrisEvans) December 25, 2019
So, Christopher, you may play Andrew Barber on Defending Jacob, but maybe keep Dodger’s grooming to the professionals?
(image: Marvel Entertainment)
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