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Don’t Let Chris Evans Shave Your Dog

Thoughts and prayers go to Dodger Evans during this difficult time.

Chris Evans as Steve Rogers shaving his beard

We’re lucky that Chris Evans grows an impressive beard, because shaving is not his strong suit. Right now, dog owners are realizing just how much they rely on going to the groomer, because they’re now forced to clip their dogs’ nails and give them haircuts in ways they never did before. What that means is that these poor dogs are now subjected to their owners … abilities, and we’ve now learned that Chris Evans will never be a dog groomer.

Sorry to dog lover Chris Evans.

Chris Evans being attacked by dogs


Chris Evans took to Twitter to share the haircut he gave Dodger. He also shared it to Instagram, but we’ll get to that after. The picture is a beautiful picture of Dodger, as Evans always shares, but when you look closely, you can tell that our poor star, our beautiful pup now has bald spots because Chris just tried his best, and sometimes your best isn’t enough.

I said “We’ll get to it later” about Instagram because new user Chris Evans is still trying to figure it all out, which means he hasn’t figured out the ability to expand your picture yet, let alone figuring out how to add borders to your pictures. So what we got was a square cut of Dodger, meaning … Evans cropped his dog’s head out of the picture.

(He’s learning. We have to be nice. He’s had a hard go of Instagram. First he posted a tree with no caption and then deleted it, and now he’s cropping off his dog’s head. He’s evolving!)

Twitter had some things to say, mainly in Dodger’s honor.

What this all means though is … stars: They’re just like us! And they’re trying to cope with their pets needing things and not being able to provide. So maybe Chris Evans should put down the razor (for both himself and Dodger, because Chris, let your hair grow for me, please) and just wait a little while because now when Dodger finally does see his reflection, he’s going to have some things to say. Should you maybe put Dodger’s Knives Out sweater on him?

So, Christopher, you may play Andrew Barber on Defending Jacob, but maybe keep Dodger’s grooming to the professionals?

(image: Marvel Entertainment)

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Resident Spider-Man expert, official Leslie Knope, actually Yelena Belova. Wanda Maximoff has never done anything wrong in her life. New York writer with a passion for all things nerdy. Yes, she has a Pedro Pascal podcast.