Woman Travels With a Male Colleague for a Work Trip. Then Realizes She Never Felt as Protected in Her Marriage: ‘It Wasn’t Controlling’
She had a realization.
Sometimes, we only realize things when we are no longer living in them. A mom of three shared in a video of the time she had an epiphany after witnessing how her male colleague treated women during one of the work trips that made her feel physically protected.
Alexis (@alexisjean90), a TikTok content creator who described herself as “healed-ish” from her divorce, shared that she went on a 48-hour work trip out of state with the director of her company, whom she described as someone in his 50s, ex-military, and 6’4”. For the next 48 hours, Alexis supposedly took note of the “way that this man walked through the world with a woman next to him.”
According to Alexis, her colleague would pause at doorways and motion for her to go ahead of him. On sidewalks, she claimed he would always keep an eye on where Alexis was when they walked. But the action that stood out to Alexis the most was when they were walking back to their hotel after dinner.
A walk to remember with her colleague
Alexis recalled a man—whom she claimed was transient—had prompted her colleague to “change directions” when he noticed the man was walking towards them. “I kind of ducked behind him on the opposite side. Still opposite of that transient guy,” Alexis said, adding that she was only 5’3” to her colleague’s 6’4”.
When Alexis’ colleague noticed that she was no longer on his right side, the content creator claimed that when her colleague turned back and found her on his left, he had told her, “Don’t do that.” While others may see this small act differently, to Alexis, she allegedly found the action was done out of care for her well-being: “It wasn’t controlling. It was protective. And that moment stayed with me.”
Alexis claimed that the scenario she just described wasn’t hinting at a workplace romance, as neither she nor her colleague had any romantic interest in each other. “He is a leader. A mentor that I respect heavily professionally in this company,” Alexis said.
Alexis had a moment of healing
According to Alexis, the trip gave her a cold moment of clarity when it came to relationships instead. In the mere 48 hours that she spent with her colleague, she claimed that she felt “more physically respected and protected by a male coworker than I ever had felt inside my marriage.”
While Alexis’ experience wasn’t dramatic, she claimed that the incident showed her that “healing happens in little moments like that.” She draws a comparison to the dynamics usually seen in unhealthy relationships: “You witness something so ordinary, normal to everybody else. And you truly start to understand how abnormal the things you learned to tolerate or that you tolerated actually were.”
Viewers’ attention zeroed in on the masculinity exhibited by Alexis’ colleague. “Men who actually like women do this naturally,” one user wrote. “A true gentleman is ALWAYS a gentleman, not just when they’re trying to get lucky,” another said. “Honey. You met a MAN. There are a lot of us out there. Don’t settle for less.”
This realization isn’t limited to one’s romantic relationships but can extend to friendships as well, and understanding when to put it on pause when it becomes unhealthy for you. And just because a relationship is healthy doesn’t mean that you need to stay in it because society says you should.
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