Utah woman goes to lunch after workout class. Then an older woman approaches her with the most vile question: ‘Oh girl, I am ENRAGED for you!!’
A Utah woman thought that she was having a normal lunch after a breezy gym day. Then, a woman came up to her and asked her a question that genuinely shocked her.
At first, TikToker Lydia Clark Hansen (@lydiaclarkhansen) thought the woman was going to ask her for directions or needed help. So, she was friendly and accommodating. However, the woman asked something completely disorienting that even appalled commenters.
Hansen spelled it out in her video, quoting the older woman who apparently asked, “Are you looking to be R-A-P-E-D?”
The situation, which Hansen described in a TikTok with over 315,000 views, didn’t lead to an altercation. Commenters emphasized that the woman probably needs to get educated at some point in her life.
What happened after her gym session?
Hansen was enjoying a nice lunch with a friend after a workout class when an older couple approached her. The TikToker described the couple as being in their late seventies.
At first, Hansen thought the older woman might have wanted help with something. But then, the older woman asked her a question that left her speechless.
Hansen described the encounter in detail: “She goes, ‘Are you looking to be R-A-P-E-D?’ And looks at me and I’m… taken aback.”
She continues, “After I say what, she doubles down and says, ‘You know, with what you’re wearing, you are showing men that you want to be R-A-P-E-D.’”
At the time, she was wearing a workout romper, as she had just finished the class. Hansen noticed that the woman’s husband was “right there” watching the incident occur. He kept his lips sealed and didn’t add anything.
“ I’m like, are you talking about him? Because when you marry a [expletive]. Yeah, that’s probably how you think. My friend and I were so annoyed and obviously so frustrated,” Hansen added. When she got over the shock, she told the woman she wasn’t interested in hearing her opinion and walked away.
Are older people more likely to say vile things?
At first, Hansen tried to be sympathetic toward the woman. “ She’s old. She doesn’t know,” she said in her video. But, as she thought about it more, she realized that wasn’t a very good reason to be uneducated.
There is some evidence to conclude that older people are more likely to lose inhibition, as their ability to judge what comments are appropriate in certain settings diminishes over time. There are also social explanations for older demographics saying rude things. Seniors can cling to tradition when faced with mortality, which can make it hard to adapt to things that feel “different.”
However, most viewers leaned heavily away from that mentality for a good reason. Commenters emphasized that normalizing the behavior would likely cause more harm than good.
“Being older is NO excuse to say something like this. My girl, I’m so sorry. I’m actually just glad nothing happened to you know. That’s rough,” one commenter said.
Another added, “I’m so sorry this happened to you and it’s very wrong! No one regardless of age or anything has a right to speak to you like that!”
Regardless of whether a person becomes more insensitive over time, commenters agreed that it’s not acceptable to tell someone that they’re wearing something that could get them “R-A-P-E-D.” Nor would it be fine for a person to say something callous and generally insensitive to a person of any identity.
As some viewers pointed out, the “what were you wearing?” question normalizes victim-blaming. It perpetuates false narratives that ignore why sexual assault really happens. Excusing that, rather than educating and limiting negative behavior can end up furthering traditional value systems that don’t hold up when examined, when looking at current statistics.
One person identified this point, adding, “I always think of the ‘What Were You Wearing?’ Museum when I hear comments like that & it makes me wanna cry. baby onesies, pjs, uniforms, etc. It’s never about the clothes.”
@lydiaclarkhansen SHOCKED #deinfluencing #tea #storytime #drama #minimalist ♬ original sound – lydiaclarkhansen
The Mary Sue reached out to Hansen via email for comment.
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