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Ohio woman says man booked a haircut right before their date. People are calling it a ‘manipulation tactic’: ‘He was testing your boundaries’

woman shares dating story (l) man getting a haircut (r)

Nothing says “I value your time” quite like booking a fresh fade 60 minutes before a first date. One Ohio woman thought she had a simple noon meetup planned. Then her date decided that 11 a.m. was the perfect time to announce a pre-date haircut.

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Next, he’s saying that he just got to the barber… at 11:50. When she called out the blatant time-wasting? He pivots to make it about her. TikTok has since clocked it as less “grooming” and more “boundary testing.” Apparently, some men line up more than just their edges. It seems they line up power plays, too.

What Happened Before the Date?

Linds (@linds_elize) unleashes 90 seconds of a story complete with rising conflict, a climax, and a conclusion. The enthralling notions captured the eyes of 4.6 million viewers, and almost 7,000 of them decided to leave a comment.

Linds begins the story by saying she was “supposed” to go on a date with a 34-year-old man at noon. She specifically says that they agreed to meet at 12 p.m. At 11, she gets a text from him saying he’s going to get a haircut before the date.

She offhandedly comments on the weird timing, but nonetheless, the story continues. She arrives for the date at 11:45.

“Punctual. Because I’m a grown-up and I am where I say I’m gonna be when I’m gonna be there, [expletive],” she says.

All this to preface his little text coming in at 11:49, where he states he’ll be “running a little behind.” Why? He just got to the barber at that time. 

@linds_elize I actually had to giggle because no way he just said that ? #dating #datingstorytime #datinglife #singlelife ♬ original sound – Linds

He Turns It On Her

At first, Linds says “no problem.” After all, she’s thinking it’s only going to be 10 or 15 minutes of waiting. She does feel hesitant though, telling her friends she’s unsure because he’s a man who’s “34 but can’t tell the time.”

At 12:30, Linds is already upset. Apparently, he sent his location, and his barber was a whole 30 minutes away from where they planned to meet. Fed up, she tells him, “never mind” and “I kind of feel like my time’s not respected right now.” His reply? “That’s interesting,” because apparently, she couldn’t FaceTime him earlier. 

Linds explains that her excuse was that she was getting an oil change, which she explicitly told him. He remains steadfast, calling it weird that she wants to cancel and couldn’t FaceTime. According to him, he knows why.

“Please do tell me, I’d love to know,” Linds says incredulously to the camera. That’s when he delivers the final blow: “I just think you don’t feel pretty about yourself today.”

Linds looks at the camera and finishes the video by saying, “Are you for real?” Her caption then says, “I actually had to giggle because no way he just said that.”

Viewers Pull Out the Psychology Terms

Immediately, Linds’ viewers start applauding her for dodging a bullet. One viewer says, “Men are not lonely enough!!” While a second viewer states, “They think they are so important.” 

A third shares, “I started laughing as soon as you said ’34 year old man.’”

“Why do they assume everyone has low self esteem?” questions another. One viewer simply states, “That date was over at 11:50am.”

Others agree similarly, saying it could have been cut way shorter. One viewer writes, “I just got to the barber = I’m out. Immediately.” Another says, “You should have neverminded at the 11:49 mark.”

Of course, many pull out the psychology speak. One says, “he was testing your boundaries. you did good girl.” Another says, “He learned that manipulation tactic on one of his red pill podcasts.”

Not a big stretch, considering that The Mary Sue recently covered a story where a woman found out her boyfriend was watching YouTube videos on how to manipulate her into doing what he wants. 

The Mary Sue reached out to Linds via TikTok comment.

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Image of Gisselle Hernandez
Gisselle Hernandez
Gisselle Hernandez-Gomez is a contributing reporter to the Mary Sue. Her work has appeared in the Daily Dot, Business Insider, Fodor’s Travel and more.

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