“Sam Witwicky, I am your father” —Optimus Prime, probably.
I was today years old when I discovered the existence of a Facebook page entitled “Only Way is Trucking” which … okay cool but when you venture to the page, it’s just … fun pictures about trucks. Truly, this page is comprised of wholesome posts about semi-trucks. It’s for people who really, really love trucks. Hence, it is their way.
Then someone shared a post to Twitter that went viral and sparked a lot of wink-wink Transformers jokes as a result. For a Friday in the year 2020, this seems to track.
Wtf does this mean?? Has she been shagged by optimus prime??? pic.twitter.com/TnIl5soD5a
— Joe Walker (@Jwalks172) September 2, 2020
While it’s really rather sweet, our questions emerge from pretty much everything about the original post. The caption, which reads “This picture speaks a thousand words,” to the picture itself (which is a truck looking down on a pregnant woman) is just … so much? And not in a weird way, more of a “what is happening? And why?” kind of way.
So … Twitter went a bit wild with the Optimus Prime jokes and look, can you BLAME us?
new transformers movie confirmed https://t.co/s5XqxsizHL
— Darwin🧞♂️ (@darwinhund0) September 4, 2020
“Congratulations, it’s a Mack” https://t.co/PrGzlkVOMQ
— 🌈 Xeans Icemane 🌈 (@Xeans) September 4, 2020
Optimus give her dat all-spark. https://t.co/3MKmaegCF5
— Darth Hater (@mrparks212) September 4, 2020
Optimus Prime did not “Roll Out” https://t.co/khE9KI4qwu
— It’s Finn(again) (@Finn_4U) September 4, 2020
*Optimus regretting his life choices*
“Autobots [sighs], pull out.” https://t.co/EuVbk6ZJ9g
— Fuzzy Goose (@_big_nose) September 4, 2020
Optimus Prime is the father of this child and you cannot convince me otherwise. pic.twitter.com/2TBuUCAlVP
— The Wyzard 📚💖 (@WiseWyzard) September 4, 2020
Did she fuck Optimus Prime? Is the Allspark quickening in her womb? https://t.co/kh49nwLecb
— Ali B (@wtflanksteak) September 4, 2020
And also, so many WAP jokes … like … so many.
when cardi said park that big mac truck right in this little garage https://t.co/ykxp8NnhfP
— grace (@gracesowww) September 4, 2020
it means that the big Mack truck has been parked in the little garage https://t.co/DmS09rkZRe
— Kayleigh (she/her) (@iKantDANCE_) September 4, 2020
i guess he parked the big MACK truck in the little garage… https://t.co/LTgg0OvU9O
— axel (@ta_chouchoune) September 4, 2020
He parked his Big Mac truck right in her little garage. Duh. https://t.co/kqYK3oHnwY
— kiva (@kiviacoray_) September 4, 2020
She said I want you to park that big Mack truck right in this little garage. https://t.co/xomWBdkYYF
— nom de plume (@barbyinCA) September 4, 2020
I believe the words are “park that Big Mac truck right in this little garage” https://t.co/Wn4UTdXN4b
— Kings Disease (@J_young34) September 4, 2020
For clarification, for those who didn’t grow up watching Transformers or their more recent movie incarnations, Optimus Prime is the leader of the Autobots, an alien race who can transform themselves into different vehicles. While Bumblebee is my personal favorite, Optimus Prime always rolls up as a red and blue semi-truck. Hence the joke. Maybe what we’re learning is that after all this time, Sam Witwicky is the son of Optimus Prime and that’s why Optimus loved him so much. Who knows, I’d believe it. It’s a Friday in 2020, all bets are off.
So, Optimus Prime may have … given this lovely woman his “all spark” but maybe that baby is the savior we need? Autobots, roll out.
(image: Paramount Pictures)
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