Keep your friends close and your Instagram enemies closer, am I right? Coleen Rooney, an English television personality who is married to professional footballer Wayne Rooney, took to Twitter to release an absolutely bonkers story.
It all seems to have started when Rooney realized that stories from her personal Instagram account were getting released to the British tabloid The Sun. Understandably, she wanted to know which of her trusted friends was sharing information that was personal enough to only have been shared on her private account.
She apparently had an idea of who was behind it all but rather than, you know, talk to that person directly, she launched herself into a five-month-long investigation where she blocked everyone except for her suspect from seeing her stories. Low and behold, those false, planted stories she was posting popped up in The Sun. To be fair, this is some Scorpio level detective work (even though she’s an Aries) so I highly appreciate the amount of effort she went through just to point out that her friend was truly her enemy.
The story was released on Rooney’s Twitter account in an incredibly dramatic fashion.
This has been a burden in my life for a few years now and finally I have got to the bottom of it…… pic.twitter.com/0YqJAoXuK1
— Coleen Rooney (@ColeenRoo) October 9, 2019
Rebekah Vardy, who Rooney accused of selling stories, released her own statement via the Notes app on her iPhone:
@ColeenRoo pic.twitter.com/VkhkkIa6nh
— Rebekah Vardy (@RebekahVardy) October 9, 2019
As you can see, this is the kind of thing that Twitter eats up and alas, I am right there with them. I am not immune to craving some drama between strangers. Should this have been a conversation between two friends? Yes, it should have. But also then we wouldn’t have had this Twitter exchange, complete with the age-old I was hacked! excuse.
Twitter, of course, is obsessed with this and can we blame them? It’s hilariously in-depth and something I’d probably do to my enemies but still.
It was…………………….. Rebekah Vardy’s account. pic.twitter.com/lUSqzb2tin
— Mark Di Stefano 🤙🏻 (@MarkDiStef) October 9, 2019
“It’s……Rebekah Vardy’s account.” pic.twitter.com/fVn4rn3cUL
— Andy (@alreadytaken74) October 9, 2019
Rebekah Vardy had the right to be interviewed by a WAG at least one rank senior pic.twitter.com/XkKieOLBIq
— Rob Fuller (@robfuller91) October 9, 2019
*coleen and rebekah start @‘ing each other*
me: pic.twitter.com/ezHJwzcKQp
— it’s……….@notagainben’s account (@NotAgainBen) October 9, 2019
Rebekah Vardy to The Sun anytime Coleen posts something. pic.twitter.com/wQWaMs778m
— Motherfucker Jones (@kofi_233) October 9, 2019
Judge: You’re still looking at 25 years
6ix9ine: The Instagram snitch is Rebekah Vardy pic.twitter.com/MK9vsJKuDe— Jonny Sharples (@JonnyGabriel) October 9, 2019
Rebekah Vardy watching Coleen Rooney’s Instagram stories 👀 pic.twitter.com/Od7a4tG5js
— Kay (@MissKayMurphy) October 9, 2019
Rebekah Vardy responding to Coleen Rooney’s sleuth skills
— Elias Jahshan | الياس جهشان (@Elias_Jahshan) October 9, 2019
BREAKING: Scarlett Johansson to play Coleen Rooney and Rebekah Vardy in “Instagram take down”. pic.twitter.com/kP74nUQ5ir
— Furquan Akhtar (@furquan) October 9, 2019
It’s……….Rebekah Vardy’s account. pic.twitter.com/YG7R7RxwJI
— Thomas Gorton (@AngstromHoot) October 9, 2019
— Sam (@the_cannon) October 9, 2019
we’re going to have to make a documentary about this, aren’t we
— Netflix UK & Ireland (@NetflixUK) October 9, 2019
I cannot wait for this story to end up as three different movies and as a novel but until then, we have the tweets.
(image: NBC)
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