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Bloody Good Fun

Flash Drive Shaped Like a Tampon Fools Nobody, Probably Works Just Fine (As a USB Drive)

by Susana Polo | 1:57 pm, April 23rd, 2012


We live in an age now where we’re basically tripping over USB drives emblazoned with the logo and stuffed with the press of whatever company is trying to sell you a thing, but I do remember a day when obtaining a USB drive was a thing you had to deliberately do. If you’re in the market to deliberately obtain a USB drive, this might be one you’d consider obtaining. But I’m going to recommend that, if you do buy one, that you buy it purely because it’s kinda funny, and not because you think its little masquerade will keep people from finding your USB drive.

Because this is not how a tampon appears in the “wild,” so to speak.

Yes, I may be preaching to the choir here, but we’re a female geek site so it falls squarely into the category of “if we don’t say it who will?”  Okay, maybe it’s not the most, uh, societally relevant or even most influential thing we’re ever going to report on. Ok, so it’s definitely not.

The copy on the website about it being a place “no one will look” for your files is cute but laughable. If I found this floating around it would immediately raise the following questions:

  • Why does this person just have an unwrapped tampon floating around their bag? Gross.
  • They even took it out of its applicator. What are they possibly planning on using it for? Grooooooooooss.
  • And why is its string so straight?
  • And… a loop, actually?
  • And clearly not made of white string?

And at that point I’d probably pick it up and realize it’s made out of plastic, and laugh at their gag USB device.

And then steal their sensitive government information for my bosses in the Kremlin/use the codes within to raid their bank accounts and donate the money to worthy charities/find the secret location of the mob books that will put them all away for life.

What? I can be versatile.

(Meninos via Reddit.)

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  • http://www.zapcomic.com Pascalle Lepas

    It actually looks quite a bit like an applicator-free (OB) tampon, though, yes, still outside of the packaging. OBs also don’t have white strings, and the string is tied into a loop.

    Applicator-free tampons are actually the most common type of tampon, outside of the US. For some reason (puritanical background, maybe?) women in the US prefer to use applicators.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=588906803 Stacy Roth

    Yeah I was going to say, a lot of women use the OB ones which end up creating less waste. Vagina’s aren’t Grooooooooooss.

  • http://www.zapcomic.com Pascalle Lepas

     Touching part of my body?? YUCK!

    ;)

  • palindrome82

    I like the OB tampons. I think they’re actually easier to use. And because they are so small you don’t have to carry your purse to the bathroom with you announcing your shame to the world. I used to put like 3 in my bra so I could just make that quick trip to the bathroom during classes and no one would ever be the wisest. lol!

  • http://www.zapcomic.com Pascalle Lepas

     They’re my favorite too.

  • Anonymous

    My intention was to imply that using an unwrapped, uncovered tampon that had been allowed to bounce around inside a purse alongside keys and coins and dust would be gross. Accusing me of implying that vaginas are gross with that sentence seems a bit much. 

  • Anonymous

    I had considered the fact that it was a tampon without an applicator, but didn’t actually know, so erred on the side of my own experience. Never actually used an OB tampon. Interesting. 

  • Francesca M

    Actually the OB ones are wrapped in  like saran wrap.. so you could have it bouncing around in there and be clean on in the in side. But again.. you do have to unwrap it…

  • Anonymous

    It’s actually hard to find applicator tampons at all in Australia. There’s like one brand, but I’ve never tried them and don’t get why you’d want to? Your finger works fine. Applicators are so wasteful.

  • Anonymous

    I think she was talking about how tampons don’t need applicators because it’s totally fine to touch your vagina. I think she was talking in general rather than just you.

  • http://feanna.livejournal.com/ feanna

    I used to use ob tampons too. They’re pretty much the only brand name tampon around here (Germany)(there are some cheap store owned ones) and they actually come in many more varieties than I could buy in the USA (where they had two different ones at Walmart, of course the smaller option that was a bit bigger but shorter than the bigger small one in Germany was actually perfect for me on lighter days (because I like tampos shorter) but you can’t have everything…). OB sells tampons in 4 or 5 sizes (I use a cup now, so I’m not totally up to date) and with different surfaces. For a bit of extre money the come with a “silk touch” option that makes them smoother and easier to insert on dry days. Which is also where I come to applicators, because those do make inserting the tampon when the vagina is really dry a bit easier, because the cover is pretty smooth and non-absorbent. OB actually did use (I don’t know if they still do) to sell applicator tampons (just normalsize though) around here and I’ve used them once or twise, but never bought them myself.

    What I’ve found with applicator tampons is that the string attaches differently at the bottom and that actually makes them a bit less fitting.

    Basically I agree with all who’ve said that it does look like an apllicator less tampon and could totally be modelled after an ob which has the sideways grooves and the looped (and I think that makes for much better removal) greenish string. It’s still our of the packaging though (which for ob means clear wrap with the ob brand name around the middle, which is where you open it) and I definitely wouldn’t use it anymore!

    Basically, anybody who’d be fooled by this would be somebody who’d catch a glimpse and go: UGH TAMPONS; PERIODS; GROSSNESS GET AWAY FROM ME and never look any closer. (And also definitely not touch, because this one probably won’t be soft at all.)

  • Life Lessons

    I. Want. One.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=790854591 Sophia Gilleo

    We know it’s not real, but I say my boyfriend still wouldn’t touch it!

  • http://sdhardie.tumblr.com Sheila

    I actually want one of these. I use a Diva Cup now, so this would literally be the last tampon I would ever buy. :D

  • http://twitter.com/pedestrienne Danielle McCarney

    I’m a Brit-Kiwi-Australian who lived in Canada and the US a couple of years. I’d go out of my way to find OB tampons (until I went to Diva Cup). To me, the applicator tampons seem like training wheels – I might have liked to have them when I was just starting to use tampons in high school, but as an adult they just seem so wasteful and unnecessary.

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