Check Out the New John Malkovich Movie No One Will Get to Watch for 100 Years

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If you thought you have to wait “a long time” to see The Force Awakens, or the Marvel Phase 3 films, you don’t know what “waiting for a movie” is. Well, Robert Rodriguez and John Malkovich will tell you.

At the request of Louis XIII Cognac, which is aged 100 years, the filmmaker has created a short-film tie-in starring John Malkovich that has an interesting gimmick. Just like the bottles of Louis XIII Cognac we have today have been aging since 1915, this short film is scheduled to be screened with the next batch of Louis XII Cognac…in 2115.

While we likely won’t be around to see the film, Louis XIII Cognac has released some Rodriguez-directed teaser trailers featuring John Malkovich alongside actress Shuya Chang (who is probably in the short film, too), each of which imagines what unveiling the new cognac in different versions of 2115 will be like:

No, none of this footage is from the short film. It was filmed separately. But we can still get an idea of what Rodriguez’s vibe might be. Other than this, we have no information as to what the short film is even about or who else, if anyone, is in it. Except that, according to Movies.com:

Rodriguez teased that it was set in the present and is “emotionally charged.”

So, the people of 2115 will be able to see what life was like in 2015 – at least, through Rodriguez’s prism.

Before you start planning how you’re going to cryogenically freeze yourself, if you don’t already have a ticket to the screening, you ain’t going. Louis XIII Cognac has given tickets to the screening 100 years from now to 1,000 influential people to pass down to their descendants! That is, unless they get this stasis thing on lock before then, and then they can go themselves. In any case, 1,000 people have agreed to pass down tickets to the screening to family members who will be able to see it 1,000 years from now.

One such person is Jamie King, who posted a photo of herself with her ticket on Instagram (which will seem SO dated in 100 years):

I’ve gotta say, this 1,000 “influential people” thing sounds really elitist. Then again, decanters of Louis XIII Cognac can run into the thousands of dollars, so I guess that makes sense. Still, I kind of want to do a “broke person” version of this, putting short films made by unknown filmmakers into a vault to be loaded up onto whatever the 2115 version of YouTube is for all to see. Then again, if 2115 is anything like 2015, this film will be leaked to the public immediately (if it isn’t already in the 100 years leading up to it).

But it’s probably just as well that I don’t have tickets to this future screening. Knowing me, I’d, like, lose them in a move or something.

Where will your descendants (or you!) be in 2115? And more importantly, where are you on the whole “building a time machine” enterprise?

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Author
Teresa Jusino
Teresa Jusino (she/her) is a native New Yorker and a proud Puerto Rican, Jewish, bisexual woman with ADHD. She's been writing professionally since 2010 and was a former TMS assistant editor from 2015-18. Now, she's back as a contributing writer. When not writing about pop culture, she's writing screenplays and is the creator of your future favorite genre show. Teresa lives in L.A. with her brilliant wife. Her other great loves include: Star Trek, The Last of Us, anything by Brian K. Vaughan, and her Level 5 android Paladin named Lal.