‘This should be a warning to all women’: Woman becomes a stay-at-home mom for 10 years. Then her husband tells her something shocking
‘This should be a warning to all women’: Woman becomes a stay-at-home mom for 10 years. Then her husband tells her something shocking
A mom just dropped a plot twist that makes every woman clutch her debit card like a life raft. After a decade as a stay-at-home mom—no income nor financial independence—her husband casually announced he wanted a divorce. He even said that she’d “need to start using her own credit card.” The problem? She doesn’t have one. Now the internet is sounding every alarm in the book, calling it financial abuse while the “I-told-you-so” crowd pours into the comments like it’s Black Friday.
Hard Truth for SAHMs
For those confused, SAHM is an acronym for stay-at-home-mom. The term is gaining more traction online as they seek remote jobs, side hustles, or parenting tips. There are frequent reddit posts on popular subreddits like r/Mommit, r/Entrepereneur, r/beyondthebump, and r/sahm. Many users suggest some feasible jobs for Sahms, like graphic design, daycare, blogging, etc. There are also moms that devote all their time to child-rearing, like Cortney.
Cortney (@cortneygetsfit) and her recent life update have the internet in shambles. Her minute-and-a-half clip has racked up 9.9 million views and almost 40,000 comments. Meaning her TikTok hit a nerve.
Cortney’s Wake-Up Call
The clip begins with Cortney saying, “So y’all wanna know the scariest thing, and it’s happening to me now, is being a female married.” She goes on to say she has two kids, aged five and seven, and that she’s been a SAHM for the past 10+ years. She then says, “I have no income. I have no money. I use my husband’s credit card and I use my husband’s money.”
Next, Cortney drops the bomb everyone is waiting for. Her husband asked for a divorce two weeks ago. Then, on the day she is filming the TikTok, Cortney says she usually uses an American Express credit card that has her name but is paid by her husband. Apparently, she is no longer allowed to use it. She says, “He told me he’s gonna cut it off…And he said, ‘You need to start using your own card now.’”
Cortney then looks at the camera and scoffs while saying, “What card? I don’t have a card. That is my card.”
As the clip wraps up, Cortney emphasizes how terrified she feels. “I feel like a little girl who needs their mommy because I don’t know how to take care of myself,” she says. She finishes the video by saying she doesn’t know what to do now. Her last word is “terrifying.”
What Can Cortney Do?
Being financially dependent on your spouse means putting all your trust in believing they will maintain you. However, it doesn’t mean the stay-at-home parent does nothing all day and lazes around. In an article posted back in 2024, Forbes shared a study that concluded how stay-at-home parents “do about $4,500 of unpaid labor per month.” After being a full-time mom for 10 years and receiving no compensation, what could Cortney possibly do legally?
As she mentions in a comment, what her husband is doing (cutting her off financially) is not illegal at all. Cortney admits she signed a prenup and waived alimony. Alimony is “a legal obligation on a person to provide financial support to their spouse before or after marital separation or divorce.” Combined with the prenup, there isn’t much Cortney can do concerning finances. Legally–and depending on the prenup details–she won’t be able to get any financial help on that front. However, Cortney can still appeal for support in court. Here’s how:
Uncertainty: Courts may not uphold the waiver if it is unfair when you separate.
Changed circumstances: Illness, job loss, or having children can make a waiver unfair years later.
Financial vulnerability: A lower-earning spouse could be left without reasonable support.
Court intervention: Even with a waiver, a judge can order support.
@cortneygetsfit I never thought I’d be here. 37 years old. Two kids. No income. No safety net. And suddenly being told I need to ‘use my own card’ when I don’t even HAVE one. This is the reality for so many stay-at-home moms — and nobody prepares us for it. Maybe this is why I’ve been drowning in anxiety and depression. But I’m sharing it because too many of us are suffering in silence. If you’re going through something similar, you’re not alone. We deserve security. We deserve support. We deserve to feel safe starting over. #sahm #womenempowerment #divorcesupport #mentalhealthmatters #momsoftiktok @Cortney Gets Fit ♬ original sound – Cortney Gets Fit
Suddenly, Everyone’s a Lawyer
As mentioned before, Cortney’s TikTok has almost 40 comments. It seems it lit a fire under SAHMs or just women as a whole. After all, it’s a very controversial issue. Some viewers say to fight against traditional gender roles, while others pull up some legal jargon to try and help Cortney.
One of the top comments states, “This is financial abuse. Please seek an attorney.” While another says, “You’re legally married. His money IS your money. Get a lawyer now.” A third says, “His money, his assets, his 401k, his everything is 1/2 yours!!!”
Cortney replies to all, revealing a key fact. “No. I signed a prenup and I waived alimony in that prenup.”
This is where other viewers chime in with their opinion. One viewer says, “Being a SAHM knowing there is a prenup is self sabotage.”
Another says, “That’s why SAHM is not a flex.” Cortney then responds, “I LOVE being a stay at home mom. And I still want to be. But my kids are in school, so I can work. Thank God.”
Some viewers call out the risk that SAHMs face everyday. One says, “Being a SAHM / trad wife is a dangerous risk to take.” While another shares, “Ladies – behind a SAHM is dangerous because they can turn overnight. Do not trust anyone.”
The Mary Sue reached out to Cortney via TikTok direct message.
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