The Fifty Shades of Grey movie series has finally, mercifully come to an end, but at least it got to go out with a bang—no, I don’t meant that Fifty Shades Freed provided a surprisingly satisfying ending. It served up exactly what you’d expect from the movie franchise that somehow managed to be even worse than its source material. I’m talking, of course, about the fact that it got the final honest trailer it so richly deserves.
That is, unless someone makes movies out of the alternate version told from Christian Grey’s point of view. Honestly, I’m sorry for putting that out into the Universe and will take full responsibility if it happens and we’re stuck with several more years of this movie franchise. I’m so sorry.
As far as the honest trailer goes, it’s almost become too easy to roast these movies by now, especially since they’ve all been basically the exact same flavor of bad, with none of the criticism of earlier entries ever being used to improve the ones that followed. But really, there’s nothing an honest trailer can do to this franchise that it hasn’t done worse to itself, and that’s the most rewarding part of this final takedown. The jokes are solid, but the parts that really shine are just straightforward moments from the movies—or its promotion—themselves, presented largely, or even entirely, without comment, culminating in possibly the least sizzling sizzle reel in the history of cinema.
We’ll miss you, Fifty Shades, and all the joy we’ve gotten out of you over the years, even if it wasn’t nearly in the way you intended.
(image: screengrab)
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