Cornetto Creates “Smart Rings” For Couples to Make Sure They Only Watch TV Together
What’s the weirdest part of this story: the fact that Cornetto thinks there’s a market for “smart rings” that prevents each half of a couple from watching a TV show without the other one, or the fact that an ice cream company is apparently breaking into the tech biz? That “Cornetto” brand name is indeed the one you remember from the delicious frozen cones (and from the Cornetto Trilogy). Not that it helps clear anything up to know that.
If we were still even remotely in the vicinity of April 1st, I would happily write this product off as an April Fool’s gag, because it seems like a great one. But, nope, we’re well into June at this point, and apparently Cornetto thinks that real-life couples need this device.
Here’s how it works: both halves of the couple wear this ring (on their wedding ring finger, if the advertisement is any indication, but yeesh). If both rings are in close proximity to one another, then all your streaming services will work properly and you’ll be able to watch whatever TV show you want. But if your other half (and their ring) isn’t around? You won’t be able to watch whatever TV shows have been designated by the ring. If you wanted to watch the latest ep of Empire without your significant other, too bad, because this ring definitely won’t let you do it. (No one tell Cornetto that internet piracy exists.)
The advertisement is funny and cute; it even features one gay couple, although the ad does begin stereotypically, with a woman catching her male partner in the act of “cheating” on her. Committing TV adultery is “the worst form of cheating,” the ad tells us. Again, it’s funny in context, and I’d probably be laughing except for the part where this product is real.
Ordinarily, I try to think of every possible reason why a product should exist before I write it off. I even managed to find a good reason why this seemingly inconvenient laundry-folding machine should exist, for example. In this case, though, I’ve got nothing. I don’t know how much these rings cost, but if they’re cheap, then at least they’re a funny gag gift. But if you and your other half seriously need to use these rings, then why not consider this free relationship advice:
- Let your SO watch shows without you if it’s that important to them. Maybe they’re home more often than you; who knows? You can find other great activities to do as a couple, like rock climbing or ballroom dancing or playing a co-operative video game.
- If your SO isn’t home and you want to watch a show without them, just … don’t. Find a TV show that you know they won’t be interested in, and watch that instead. There’s so much good TV out there that this shouldn’t be too hard, especially since you and your SO probably have many different interests. Wait until they get home, then watch the show that you both like, together. Install filters online to block out spoilers if that’s a concern for you.
There! Now you don’t need to buy a ring. Unless it’s a different kind of ring, in which case, you can probably find one that looks a lot nicer than this. Maybe you’ll even find one that does way cooler stuff.
—The Mary Sue has a strict comment policy that forbids, but is not limited to, personal insults toward anyone, hate speech, and trolling.—
Have a tip we should know? [email protected]