Woman makes boyfriend in charge of one thing for wedding in the Bahamas. Then they get to the airport: ‘That’s not quirky or cute’
There’s nothing quite like sharing your personal life in the void of public opinion. You might think your experience is cute and harmless, but an army of strangers will be quick to decide otherwise.
That’s exactly what’s happening for one woman on TikTok, who’s currently going viral—perhaps for the wrong reasons.
‘This man was in charge of ONE THING’
In a video first posted on Mar. 12, which now has well over 300,000 views, Annabelle Johnson (@annabellejordanjohnson on TikTok) shared a seemingly innocuous video filmed before a couple’s trip. In it, Johnson shares a little anecdote about her boyfriend—one she clearly intends to be cute, even if it wasn’t necessarily received as such.
“We’re going to the Bahamas for a wedding,” Johnson begins in her video, clearly filming inside an airport. “And the only thing I told my boyfriend that he had to pack and that he was in charge of was a suit for the wedding in the Bahamas.”
Johnson is shown striding through the airport with the text “say a prayer for me & my sanity” overlaid onto the video. Her caption reads, “This man was in charge of ONE THING HAHAHAHA plz send help.” All this leads to the kicker: Did her boyfriend do what she asked? Did he execute on the “only thing” he was expected to pack?
Alas. No.
“Didn’t bring a suit,” Johnson laughs. “Can’t find a suit anywhere. It’s 7am.”
And so, literally moments before their flight takes off, Johnson and her boyfriend have to frantically scour nearby stores for an appropriate suit.
“So now we are at the airport in Johnson and Murphy,” Johnson finishes. “And he is trying to find a suit in the airport for the wedding that we are currently on the way to. Wish me luck.”
@annabellejordanjohnson this man was in charge of ONE THING HAHAHAHA plz send help #boyfriend ♬ original sound – Annabelle Shop Homewurk
Viewers are scathing toward the boyfriend
While Johnson’s video is clearly lighthearted in tone, intention, and execution, her comment section was overwhelmingly filled with criticism. Viewers seemed to think this was a classic example of a man displaying “weaponized incompetence,” or “strategic incompetence.” Or, more simply, that this is just a good-old-fashioned red flag.
“I would be so pissed if this happened!!” one viewer commented. “Things like that, just make me think he doesn’t care enough about you to listen to what you have to say! I hope that that’s not true.”
“The fact that you had to tell him to bring a suit?” another wrote. “For a wedding…?” Johnson responded, writing, “Yeah I’m concerned too.”
Multiple commenters questioned Johnson’s decision to post the video in the first place, considering how universally negative the response has been.
“Why are you telling this to us?” one viewer asked. “Did you think we’d laugh?” echoed another.
Other partnered and/or married women chimed in, voicing their concerns. Many seemed intent on warning Johnson that this small act of incompetence is not normal, or could be indicative of deeper problems.
“I literally have never had to tell my husband what to pack,” one commented. “He’s independent.”
“I’m so glad I don’t have to baby my partner,” another wrote. “That sounds so fucking exhausting.”
“No,” one viewer warned. “Sorry. I promise you this will not get better and this isn’t really that funny.”
What is weaponized incompetence?
According to Psychology Today, “Weaponized incompetence, also called strategic incompetence, is when someone knowingly or unknowingly demonstrates an inability to perform or master certain tasks, thereby leading others to take on more work.”
“Consistently, weaponized incompetence leads to an unequal division of labor,” Psychology Today writes. “[It] involves strategically avoiding responsibility—by pretending to be incapable or inept at a task so that someone else helps, takes over, or stops delegating tasks to them. In this way, the imbalance becomes entrenched over time.”
But what does this have to do with Johnson, her boyfriend, or dating in general? Well, there’s a gendered aspect to weaponized incompetence that many women have experienced. Namely, women have noticed they’re often on the receiving end of this phenomenon from male partners or even colleagues.
Glamour Magazine reported on this phenomenon in its piece “Men are being called out by women on TikTok for using ‘weaponised incompetence’ to avoid chores.” Writer Melanie Ho published a Medium essay on “why weaponized incompetence happens,” analyzing the roots of these behaviors and how to stop them. Feminist writer Zawn Villines also wrote an essay on the subject, titled “Why weaponized incompetence is such a core feature of misogyny.”
In her Huffington Post article “‘Weaponized Incompetence’ Screws Women Over At Work And In Relationships,” Brittany Wong cites a 2020 Gallup study that reflected the phenomenon in everyday households.
“[The study] showed that even among egalitarian-minded millennial couples, it’s gender rather than the earnings of individuals that shapes the division of household labor,” Wong writes.
The Mary Sue has reached out to Johnson via email.
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