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what is this I don't even

Stephen Colbert Discovers He Has Two Vaginas

by Susana Polo | 11:54 am, July 26th

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We picked up on Summers Eve‘s array of douching supplies last week, and it’s even more mind-blowingly awful advertising that does its best to simultaneously say “You should feel empowered because you have a vagina,” and “vaginas are so icky that we can’t even say the word out loud and lord girl will you clean up down there I mean gross.”

We were stunned absolutely speechless and may never be able to look at hand puppetry the same way. Stephen Colbert, on the other hand, doesn’t “think it’s fair that women have these commercials marketed at them telling them that their bodies aren’t good enough the way they are. This completely ignores men and [their] deeply troubling genitals.” We invite you to experience the result, based on Summers Eve’s next series of commercials featuring hand puppets.

You know, where you make a lose fist and wiggle your thumb Señor Wences style?… except vertical… so it represents vaginas. The vaginas of three different women.

Haha, did I say women? I meant racial stereotypes.

See, there’s the light-skinned hand-vagina who is over committed and whines about the gym,

The sassy dark-skinned hand-vagina who mmm-hmms and spends time on her hair,

and the tanned hand-vagina who talks very fast in Spanish and says ay-yi-yi.

Presumably another fair-skinned hand-vagina of a slightly different hue who was good at math and playing the violin was scrapped somewhere along the line.

(via Styleite.)

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  • http://twitter.com/fireholly99 Holly

    Somehow these adverts make me feel embarrassed to have a vagina, like it’s a freaky mutation that should be thought of with only contempt.

    So not only have they not managed to sell me their product, they have managed to unsell me one of my better organs.

    Yeah, I think this counts as a fail.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=681460421 Lauron Haney

    Hey, if my vagina was secretly a hand, I would be embarrassed too. I can also be embarrassed by my handgina for my ethnicity!

    Thanks Summer’s Eve! Without your commercials, I don’t think my genitals would have been able to reach their full, terrible potential.

  • http://twitter.com/acidragdoll Bel

     Positive:  If Stephen Colbert is picking this up as ridiculous, that’s probably indicative that a lot more people do, too?  Perhaps we are winning this one.

  • Anonymous

    When the computers take over, all the various types of human genitals will be replaced by convenient, easy to use, and universally compatible bioports.

    So, am I the only one who thought the “ethnic” Summer’s Eve ads were parodies at first?

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Kristin-Frederickson/852880113 Kristin Frederickson

    Anyone know where I go to watch this in Canada?

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_7G4SWUX2MCWWXLMYNN347JMIZY Frodo Baggins

    Yeah, because Snuggies did so poorly after becoming a punchline on every comedy show.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_7G4SWUX2MCWWXLMYNN347JMIZY Frodo Baggins

    MMMMMM-hmm.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_7G4SWUX2MCWWXLMYNN347JMIZY Frodo Baggins

    Sorry, you have to go south of the border.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_7G4SWUX2MCWWXLMYNN347JMIZY Frodo Baggins

    So, which is more racist, the Latina Vagina, or Cartman’s Hhhhhennifer Lopez?

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_7G4SWUX2MCWWXLMYNN347JMIZY Frodo Baggins

    Haha, one of the animators who worked on the original ad just posted, “I like Colbert’s version better” on Facebook.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=508654630 Emily Metaldog Harrison

     except that i think most women don’t want to be told that their genitals are a disgusting mess that needs extra product to take care of otherwise who would ever want to go near it

    blankets with sleeves… that’s dumb i guess but whatever

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Cathy-Creswell/564854340 Cathy Creswell

    HANDGINA!!!!!!!!!!!! Lol, good one!

  • http://twitter.com/acidragdoll Bel

    I can’t really speak to the Snuggie economy.

  • http://www.thechildhealthsite.com/clickToGive/home.faces?siteId=1 Edcedc8

    those stereotypres were weird. and hilarious.