TikTok stills from Chelsea Smallwood and The Dadvocate on the Cheating Chelsea scandal
(@the_dadvocate/@theowandthewife/TikTok)

‘Side pieces are the new Ghostbusters?’: Embattled proud cheater Chelsea Smallwood claims cheating is good for ‘demon relief’

Chelsea Smallwood, the proud cheater who monetized infidelity, isn’t letting a lawsuit silence her. She’s continued sharing her cheating advice, including her latest claims that cheating is a “conduit” for “demon relief.”

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Smallwood went viral on TikTok after posting a video titled, “Things your husband did while he was in an affair with me,” where she joyously danced while listing all her affair details. On the platform, she managed to attain an audience interested in her “cheating content.” Eventually, she turned cheating into a business when she established The Other Woman and the Wife LLC. She began producing a podcast, creating communities for cheaters, and even offering infidelity “coaching” to individuals, even though she has no qualifications to act as a life coach or counselor. Recently, Smallwood, her business, and business partner Olivia Nicodeumos were sued over disturbing allegations that they horrifically bullied a betrayed spouse.

Kristen Jacobs alleged in her lawsuit that Smallwood and Nicodeumos shared her full name online, read her private text messages on public TikTok reels, posted photos of her and her minor children for the cheating community to mock, and even tried to contact Jacobs’ therapist. Smallwood filed a response denying the allegations and deleted her original TikTok account, presumably to get rid of evidence. However, she quickly created a new account and has continued pushing her cheating rhetoric, which is growing increasingly unhinged.

Chelsea Smallwood suggests cheating can … exorcise demons?

The internet is used to Smallwood saying and doing fairly unhinged things, like dancing about having an affair and trying to violate HIPPA privacy laws to bully betrayed spouses. Recently, though, The Dadvocate caught something particularly bizarre. Smallwood posted a video in which she argues that infidelity “can be a doorway to profound personal growth when you have the right support.” She talks about how, if someone has guidance while navigating infidelity, they can uncover all these personal truths and “unveil profound expansion of wisdom and insight.” However, then she starts describing how “the act of cheating” can serve as a “conduit for exploring hurt, frustration release, and ultimately, demon relief.”

@theowandthewife

As a life coach who’s navigated her own way to the other side of infidelity – I deeply understand the overwhelming emotions and confusion you’re experiencing. Many people try to handle infidelity alone, trapped between their feelings and society’s harsh judgment, often making decisions from a place of shame rather than self-awareness. But here’s what I’ve learned: Infidelity, while painful, can be a doorway to profound personal growth when you have the right support. It’s not about justifying actions – it’s about understanding them to make conscious choices moving forward. I recently worked with a client who felt completely lost in her affair fog. Through guided self-reflection, she uncovered patterns from her childhood that were driving her choices. This awareness didn’t erase her situation’s complexity, but it empowered her to make decisions aligned with her authentic self. The truth is, judgment-free guidance can transform this crisis into a catalyst for understanding yourself deeply and making choices from a place of clarity rather than chaos. Ready to move from confusion to clarity? Click the link in my bio to book a consultation and learn how professional support can help you navigate this challenging time with wisdom and self-compassion.

♬ original sound – The Other Woman & The Wife

She doesn’t explain what exactly she means by the ultimate goal of cheating being “demon relief,” though she does go on a spiel praising cheating as a “liberating force for the soul” and urging her followers to share their stories with her. Of course, The Dadvocate wasn’t willing to let that “demon relief” comment slide. “I fear Cheating Chelsea has completely lost it,” she begins her video. She asks, “But now you’re saying cheating is the new method for exorcising demons? So, side pieces are the new Ghostbusters? You just suck them up, like, *shoooop*?”

@the_dadvocate

This cheating business lawsuit started wild but now has me shook to my core #cheater #exposed #theowandthewife

♬ original sound – Lauren

On a more serious note, The Dadvocate noted that this isn’t the first time Smallwood has thrown around some strange language. She frequently uses terms like “rebirth” and “enlightenment,” which makes one think she’s not talking about personal demons but really getting into some spiritual/metaphysical territory, which is weird for someone talking about infidelity. She has been pushing to rebrand affairs as “complicated connections” and claiming that infidelity is this spiritual thing that can be a “catalyst for personal growth” and “profound self-discovery.” The Dadvocate noted that she’s “really giving cult leader” vibes. Previously, The Dadvocate noted comparisons between Smallwood’s business and the Twin Flames cult, given that both are trying to turn relationships into businesses and coaching clients to make drastic decisions about their relationships despite having no experience to be doing any “coaching.”

To be fair, the basics of some of Smallwood’s ideas aren’t wrong. She’s right that infidelity isn’t always black and white, and having more open discussions/reflections on the topic may help some cheaters understand things about themselves and why they did what they did. However, claiming that cheating can usher in this spiritual journey and path to self-discovery is very extreme. The thing she seems to be missing is that cheating is complex in some cases. In other cases, it’s pretty simple. People often cheat simply because of selfishness, narcissism, envy, etc. Some people even cheat as a form of emotional abuse to gaslight, manipulate, and treat their partners as less than. In these cases, the cheaters aren’t going to be enlightened or exorcise their demons. They’re probably going to continue to suffer from the things that made them feel entitled to cheat in the first place.

In a few years, all the people who are inspired to cheat by Smallwood’s claims of self-discovery and demon exorcism are probably going to be very disappointed to find that they ruined their relationships for no reason and haven’t found that enlightenment she’s talking about.


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Rachel Ulatowski
Rachel Ulatowski is a Staff Writer for The Mary Sue, who frequently covers DC, Marvel, Star Wars, literature, and celebrity news. She has over three years of experience in the digital media and entertainment industry, and her works can also be found on Screen Rant, JustWatch, and Tell-Tale TV. She enjoys running, reading, snarking on YouTube personalities, and working on her future novel when she's not writing professionally. You can find more of her writing on Twitter at @RachelUlatowski.