Server asks large table what they are celebrating. She wasn’t ready for their response. Now she’s issuing a warning to other servers
It’s not unusual for servers to attend to large parties during their shift. These typically involve families and friends celebrating birthdays, holidays, anniversaries, or graduations. Once (or a few times) in a blue moon, the reunion is for a depressing reason: burying a loved one. If a server asks about the occasion, it can affect the mood.
This is why one server urged fellow waitstaff to stop doing this after making that same mistake several times.
Table For Tears?
The five-second clip features server Alivia Henry (@alivia.with.an.a) glancing around the room to Enya’s “Only Time” remix. Without saying a word, she imparts a piece of restaurant-industry advice to 1 million viewers via on-screen text.
“Server advice [No. 1:] When you have a large party early in the morning, don’t ask why they got together or if they’re celebrating!” the content creator writes in the text overlay. “It’s always a funeral.”
Embarrassed, Henry sought answers from other servers in the caption, “pls tell me this is universal.”
Moreover, she claimed in the comments section that she has done this “At least 15 [times].”
Is This A Universal Server Experience?
As Henry requested, servers across TikTok responded. From their stories, this wasn’t out of the ordinary and revealed similar customer blunders.
“Had a 30 top mid afternoon & we were chatting it up & I asked if they needed candles for the cake because I thought it was a birthday. She was coming from her husband’s funeral,” one viewer recalled.
“One time I told a family they were dressed so nicely and asked what the occasion was..it was indeed a funeral,” another shared.
“At a job i worked, we had to ask because we sang a birthday song, said ‘are we celebrating anything today?’ And was hit with ‘a funeral,’” a third revealed. “Before my brain could even really process a good response, i said ‘okay! Before we start, does anybody have any allergies? Don’t wanna make it two funerals!’”
Furthermore, customers weighed in on being on the receiving end of this question.
“Had a server who kept forgetting we were all together for our family members bday who had passed. She was like, ‘can’t believe you guys aren’t taking advantage of the margarita specials,’” one commenter stated.
On the flip side, a second had a server who turned it into a positive experience. “I was out with family after my grandmother’s funeral, and the server asked what we were celebrating. My aunt went, ‘Well, my mom just died,’ and the server didn’t miss a BEAT before saying, ‘Then we’re celebrating her life.’”
What Are The Most Popular Funeral Times?
According to Thomas M. Gallagher Funeral Home, mornings (9 am-11 am) are the most popular time for funeral services. In addition to religious practices and culture, this is to accommodate travelers. The second popular option is afternoon (1 pm- 3 pm). After the morning ceremony, it’s a prevalent tradition for mourners to dine out and reminisce about the deceased loved one. Therefore, it is likely why Henry has had multiple encounters with grieving customers.
@alivia.with.an.a pls tell me this is universal
♬ original sound – mixedbynat
The Mary Sue reached out to Henry via Instagram direct message and TikTok comment.
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