‘Needs to be studied’: NYC matchmaker gets email from woman looking for a husband. One quality she wants has people screaming ‘huge red flag’
A matchmaker has gone viral on TikTok after sharing an email exchange she had with an especially picky client.
In a viral clip, which has amassed 815,000 views, Nida Ahm (@leveluponepercent) detailed her experience with a female client in her Muslim dating pool. “People’s obsession with physicians needs to be studied,” she said. “Especially in the South Asian community.”
Her client is a female physical therapist who seems to want to marry a physician for two main reasons: because her father is one, and because she wants to be married to someone who also works in healthcare.
In an email to Ahm, the woman asks her to ask the potential match what specialty he is doing in his residency. But the matchmaker makes it clear that she doesn’t appreciate the back-and-forth, and wonders why the woman can’t do this herself.
So, she emails the client saying, “Is there a reason this needs to be confirmed at this stage?”
The client replies by explaining that her father is a doctor. She also claims that she has a good idea of what areas she’d want her ideal match to specialize in, and tells the matchmaker that she isn’t interested in someone in primary care unless they plan on specialising further.
In response to this, Ahm tells the client that her requests are “oddly particular.”
“You are not a physician yourself, and your father being a physician is irrelevant—they’re marrying you, not your father,” she says in the email. “Let me know if you’d like to move forward with this match with the information provided. Further than that, I’m not sure my service is right for your needs.”
Is the client a gold digger?
“Her getting so nitty gritty and specific about her requirements… it screams ulterior motives and kind of gold digger-ish,” Ahm told viewers. “And just the fact that she called out primary care specialities not good enough for her is just a red flag.”
Despite this, the client confirmed in a follow-up email that she wanted to move forward. She explained that she mentioned her father because she knows what medical specialties have the best work-life balance.
The matchmaker, in turn, put the woman through to the next stage. She says that while she hasn’t heard back from the man yet, she warned him that this client had specific requirements on medical specialties and recommended that he ask her open-ended questions.
Ahm didn’t immediately respond to The Mary Sue’s request for comment via TikTok comment and email.
What did commenters think?
Commenters, in turn, were suspicious. “She gave me the ick,” one wrote. “She wants to be a surgeon’s wife,” another claimed. A third stated plainly that “it’s about money.” A fourth remarked, “I love how strict you are.”
Other commenters noted that the client may not have been honest about her work-life balance question. “Well, primary care has the best work-life balance so that is NOT the reason she’s asking,” a fifth noted.
While a sixth concurred, “It’s about money, not work-life balance. Primary generally has the best balance but the lowest pay.”
@leveluponepercent To not want to potentially even exchange photos with someone because they’re not the right kind of doctor despite the other requirements aligning is wild. She backpedaled quick though. Some won’t be happy that I moved her along in the process. However I think people are generally aware that they are being quantified by their matches at this stage. I felt it was necessary to inform him, but if they like each other, good for them ?♀️ #matchmaker #matchmaking #datingapps #muslim #realitycheck ♬ original sound – Onepercentbetter
Dating coach on why dinner on the first date is a red flag
Ahm isn’t the only dating expert sharing their thoughts on TikTok.
Dating coach Tay (@tayydiazmercado) recently went viral for her controversial opinion that dinner dates are a bad choice for a first date. The reason? It basically comes down to too much too soon.
“What dinner in 2025 as a first date feels like to a majority of women–and I’ve talked to a lot of them–is like you and me going scuba diving and I take you 100 feet deep real quick,” she explains.
Tay adds that a better alternative is to do a more low-key dating activity, where “she can leave it anytime.”
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