Arizona woman plans first date for 5:30pm. Then she waits to see if he texts at all during the day: ‘Tbh by 12 pm I’m making new plans’
An Arizona woman schedules a first date and hopes the man will text her on the day of their plans. She decides to take matters into her own hands an hour before they’re supposed to meet.
In a video with over 634,000 views, TikToker Andrea (@psychodre23) checks in every couple of hours starting the morning of her date. She takes a short video during each check-in to update viewers on whether her date has texted her yet.
“I have a first date at 5:30 tonight. Let’s see if he texts me during the day,” she writes in on-screen text. Around 1 p.m., she notes that both of them posted separately on their social media stories.
At 4 p.m., Andrea debates getting ready even though she didn’t hear from him.
The man didn’t text her by 4:30 p.m., which spiked her anxiety. So she decides to text him herself to confirm their plans.
Despite the lack of communication, Andrea shares that she had a “great date.” She notes in the caption, “2nd date booked.”
Should a Man Text You On the Day of Your First Date?
While there are no strict rules about texting before a first date, many women on social media say they prefer a man to reach out to show that he’s still interested.
A woman on r/datingoverthirty laments that no text from her first date led her to assume it was off. She was shocked when her date texted her that he was at the location, and asked other women their opinion on the situation that led to a burnt bridge.
“If I don’t get a confirmation text I don’t go! WTF- even with your besties you text like ‘hey still on for tonight?'” a commenter replies.
However, there’s a reason some guys may avoid texting very much before the first date. And it’s not because he isn’t interested.
“Yeah I mirror whatever they do. Sometimes I can have deep in depth conversations over text, talk life, plans, intimacy, tell stories, etc, then still talk for hours on a date,” one man in the r/dating subreddit suggests. “Other times it’s the bare minimum for texting. Depends on the person and their communication style.”
Another writes, “Just enough to show interest and work out logistics. Otherwise I save it for the actual date.”
What would other women do?
In the comments of the viral TikTok, other women share how they would have handled the lack of communication ahead of the first date.
“If you don’t talk to me the whole day of our supposed planned date i assume it’s canceled,” one writes.
“All day without a text not even a good morning beautiful no we’re not doing that,” a second remarks.
Another adds, “Idk I wouldn’t have shown if I didn’t get a text. But I also would have texted to confirm that morning. No response to that is a no show for me.”
Others share similar experiences with their dates.
@psychodre23 I swear he was at the restaurant with me ? 2nd date booked ✔️ #datinginyour30s #datingtok #firstdate #datingstorytime #firstdates ♬ TY FOR USING MY SOUND – ໒꒰ྀི ๑ ´ ˘ ` ू ꒱ྀིაᰔᩚ܀∘˚???
“This happened to me once and he was mia but when the time got closer he was like on my way and my ass never got ready since he didn’t text me all day,” a viewer says.
“Nope…thats why I dont go out anymore….cause how u texting me ever morning and this and that and on the day we supposed to hang out, NO ANSWER,” another laments.
Andrea replies to comments suggesting that she should have stayed home. She writes, “Although I agree, I WOULD HAVE LIKED for him to text me first and confirm. He was there. Imagine I didn’t show up just because he never texted me.”
The Mary Sue reached out to Andrea via TikTok direct message and comment.
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