This is the first time I’ve heard the name Mario Lopez in quite a while. I guess this post on Twitter is the only noteworthy thing he’s done since … what did he last do anyway? Hmm, so according to the internet, his most notable recent acting role was playing Colonel Sanders in a KFC-sponsored short film for Lifetime called A Recipe for Seduction. He did also reprise his role of A.C. Slater in the shockingly great Saved By the Bell revival, but if I’m wondering whether I’m supposed to take him seriously or not, this sure isn’t helping.
In a recent Twitter post, Mario Lopez appears to be using an oblique reference to the Bible in order to defend … gun rights? I think that’s what’s going on here?
Lopez’s Twitter post reads: “A rock in bad hands killed Abel. A rock in good hands killed Goliath. It’s not about the rock,” which sounds like the Christian way of saying “Guns don’t kill people, people kill people.”
Well, let’s break that down shall we? Unlike rocks, guns aren’t naturally occurring, don’t have myriad different uses beyond killing, and aren’t exactly just laying around on the ground. Exceptions do exist, like that time a school superintendent in Texas accidentally forgot his gun in the bathroom of an elementary school. But that’s the exception, not the rule. The rule is that guns must be purchased from your local Walmart instead. Not exactly just laying around, but still pretty easy to get. Also, a rock, while dangerous, can only be used to kill one person at one time. A gun, meanwhile, can be used to kill many people at one time. And unlike a fatal attack from a rock, which would require quite a bit of strength from the attacker, a gun can very easily dispatch someone with a simple trigger pull.
So I ask of you this, Mario Lopez, if Dylan Roof had wandered into a a church in Charleston with a hefty piece of pumice, do you think he would have been able to successfully murder nine Black churchgoers within the span of a few minutes? Do you think that if Omar Marteen had come to Pulse Nightclub with a rather sharp piece of shale he could have used it to kill 49 people and wound 53 more before police killed him with particularly sharp rocks of their own? Do you think that Stephon Paddock would have been able to throw pellets of gravel out of his Las Vegas hotel accurately enough to kill 61 people and injure 867 before finally turning one of those pellets on himself to commit suicide?
No? Me neither. So please, go back to making your fried chicken romance movies for corporations and shut the hell up.
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