This Has To Be an Early April Fools Joke, Right? … Right?
Urban Decay. I haven’t heard that name in a long time, not since I went to a high school with an inordinate amount of theater kids. It’s a makeup brand that’s supposed to cater to an “alternative” kind of look, and was popular amongst the goths and scene kids in particular who’d haunt around the amphitheater (for reference, they had a Tumblr called “The Violet Underground”).
However, what also made them incredibly popular was their wide range of colors for all kinds of skin tones, which made them one of the most accessible makeup brands out there. And now, it would seem, they’re trying to broaden their access even further, by way of … well … just take a look at this.
I had to do a double-take when I saw this. I’d forgotten all about Urban Decay, so for a moment, my brain was fried between my personal distaste for lube and whether or not this was literally just goopy makeup.
It’s not. It’s lube. Cast upon purple ultraviolet light, we have a big ol’ puddle of good-good and a canister getting stroked better than your dad’s Sunday golf club.
Is this satire? Most likely. They are having a very silly time of it in the comments:
However, they’re also taking the more positive spins somewhat seriously:
And like, look, obviously same, we love normalizing sexual health products, but I always raise an eyebrow when corporations try so hard to relate to us peons. What’s your angle here, Urban Decay? What’s going on here? Did you really just let an intern have fun with it to gain more followers, or is this a distraction from other things going on?
Okay, yes, I’m jaded, and you’re welcome to ignore me and enjoy the funny sex joke—if it is a joke. Is it? April Fools’ Day is tomorrow, and this was posted yesterday … maybe? Or are we getting smoky purple lube now? Eh, no thanks, not for me at least. I don’t like my oral sex to be grape flavored. But y’all go crazy, have fun with it.
Who knows? Maybe it’ll double as makeup in the end, anyways, both for your genitals and your eyes. Just make sure to drink plenty of cranberry juice after administering.
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