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This Disney World Reopening Commercial Will Haunt Your Dreams

Honestly just replace the Haunted Mansion with this clip on a loop.

As Florida reports a record-breaking 15,000 new COVID-19 cases, fans gathered outside the gates of Disney World desperate to return to the iconic theme park. Disney World, which has been closed for months, reopened its doors yesterday, starting with Magic Kingdom and Disney’s Animal Kingdom. Epcot and Disney’s Hollywood Studios will be opening on July 15.

The reopening went forward, despite protesting from employees and over 7,000 people signing a petition on MoveOn.org.

The petition read, “This virus is not gone, unfortunately it’s only become worse in this state. Having our theme parks remain closed until cases are steadily decreasing would keep our guests, our employees and their families safe. Re-opening the theme parks is only putting our guests, employees, and families at higher risk for contracting COVID-19.”

Still, Disney World promoted its reopening with the commercial above, which shows various employees (all in masks) cleaning and wiping down the park. The commercial, like the reopening, is peak late stage capitalism. Because what are employees and safety guidelines compared to the profit margin of a conglomerate worth billions of dollars?

This already dystopian video was unnerving on its own, but thanks to the internet, folks are making their own versions. From changing the music to the opening score of The Shining to adding sound effects from The Purge films, people are going to town on Disney willfully endangering their employees:

And while plenty of people were offering their own versions of the commercial, many were questioning the logic of going to a crowded park in the midst of a pandemic outbreak. Because IT’S BONKERS.

It would be funny if it weren’t so mindbogglingly dangerous. How greedy does a corporation have to be? ?ow incompetent does the state and local government have to be? And how wildly irresponsible are all of these people bringing children to a viral hotspot?

Truly, you’d be safer at Jurassic Park.

(image: screencap/The DIS)

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Chelsea was born and raised in New Orleans, which explains her affinity for cheesy grits and Britney Spears. She currently lives in sunny Los Angeles, with her husband and two poorly behaved rescue dogs. She is a former roller derby girl and a black belt in Judo, so she is not to be trifled with. She loves the word “Jewess” and wishes more people used it to describe her.