As 2020 limps across the finish line, Americans breathe a sigh of relief as the Trump family spends their final holidays in the White House. There is so much that is good and life affirming about Trump’s epic loss to Joe Biden, but one of the minor thrills is the end of Melania’s war on Christmas. No more will we be subjected to whatever stark Nordic dystopian fever dream the First Lady conjures up. And thankfully we won’t have to suffer through any more bizarre Christmas hostage videos like this classic:
The People’s House @WhiteHouse is ready to celebrate Christmas and the holiday season! pic.twitter.com/oejKW3mC15
— Melania Trump (@FLOTUS) November 26, 2018
We also won’t get any more haunting holiday decorations like these gems, which look like the unholy designs of Krampus, Aunt Lydia and the White Witch from Narnia:
why do the White House Christmas decorations look like Voldemort is about to come back pic.twitter.com/nF0GxCaxUq
— Kate Gray (@hownottodraw) November 27, 2017
This is Melania Trump’s only job and she does it like a Martian on NyQuil. pic.twitter.com/OjFUleIevR
— Jennifer Wright (@JenAshleyWright) November 26, 2018
Of course, we know that Melania doesn’t give a reindeer’s ass about Christmas, or about the job of First Lady. She told us herself, in the secretly recorded audio where she exclaims, “I’m working … my a** off on the Christmas stuff, that you know, who gives a f*** about the Christmas stuff and decorations? But I need to do it, right? … OK, and then I do it and I say that I’m working on Christmas and planning for the Christmas and they said, ‘Oh, what about the children that they were separated?’ Give me a f****** break.”
In secretly recorded audio, Melania Trump says about reporters asking her about kids separated at border: “Give me a fucking break.” She assails the “liberal media,” says she doesn’t want to do a story on Fox, and adds, “Who gives a fuck about Christmas stuff and decorations?” pic.twitter.com/Ia2U2WmzN5
— Oliver Darcy (@oliverdarcy) October 2, 2020
Still, despite her comments, Melania continues going through the motions of Christmas at the White House, which include welcoming the Christmas tree:
Today I welcomed the arrival of the beautiful @WhiteHouse Christmas Tree! We are excited to begin decorating the People’s House for the holiday season! #WHChristmas pic.twitter.com/8Qaq9sfiw9
— Melania Trump (@FLOTUS) November 23, 2020
Of course, the internet was quick to roast the First Lady for decorating the Titanic as it sinks into the ocean:
I’m very much looking forward to the Hamilton-style musical about Trump when we’ll get to hear Melania’s “Who gives a fuck about Creezmus” song. https://t.co/aPVnDNmgif
— Jon Cryer (@MrJonCryer) November 24, 2020
In fairness, Melania Trump knows how to pose w/oversized dying things. https://t.co/9HmNoMExUh
— John Fugelsang (@JohnFugelsang) November 24, 2020
Melania still wants us to believe she gives a fuck about Christmas. https://t.co/3dbd8vbg2p
— Shannon Watts (@shannonrwatts) November 24, 2020
Melania Trump watching that big ass Christmas tree pull up like pic.twitter.com/0FjEB7BY2v
— Big Girl Slay 💋 (@Biggirlslay) November 23, 2020
Melania Trump received the WH Christmas tree today… pic.twitter.com/2AjU6KnG5Z
— Mark – ’bout damn time GSA! (@MarkBrunowski) November 23, 2020
predictions for melania’s last white house christmas
-rudy giuliani in a santa suit
-the word “DECORATION” printed out and taped up
-N95 masks cut into snowflakes
-real reindeer bones— Sarah Lazarus (@sarahclazarus) November 24, 2020
We all know how you feel about “effing Christmas” @FLOTUS & the drudgery of making the People’s House festive in celebration of the birth of a Savior your complicit actions show you don’t know or serve. Babies in cages ring a bell? As for you and this tree, #IReallyDontCareDoYou? https://t.co/p8irl2MJIH
— yvette nicole brown (@YNB) November 24, 2020
It is deeply hilarious that Melania, who clearly doesn’t give a f*** about Christmas, is forced to celebrate it once more before the Trumps are kicked out of the White House. And I get it: she’s a busy woman. Melania has to pack her shit, file for divorce, disavow her husband, all while decorating a “Be Best” Christmas only to have it ripped to shreds by the internet?
The schadenfreude is truly a holiday gift to us all.
(featured image: screencap/NBC News)
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