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Car Hits Man in Zombie Costume Who Was Trying to Scare Motorists. Success?

Zombie apoccident? Hit and shamble?

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45-year-old Jeffrey Stiles of Muskegon, Michegan wasn’t content with the fun of the Halloween party he was attending, so he decided to step outside and spice things up. By scaring motorists. In his zombie costume. How could that possibly go wrong?

Exactly as you’d imagine it would, especially considering police have confirmed Stiles was standing in the traffic lane when he was struck by a car. When trying to frighten people piloting hurtling hunks of metal, it’s best to stay safely in the shoulder. Or, you know, maybe not do it at all?

Luckily, he was hospitalized with non-life threatening injuries and will be fine, which probably can’t be said of the driver who is now frantically trying to flee the zombie apocalypse. Police are still searching for the driver, so we’re currently unable to get a firm answer on why they thought it would be OK to flee after hitting someone with a car, but that answer probably goes something like, “What would you do if you managed to escape a zombie attack?”

If you live in the area and want to assist in bringing the hit-and-run driver to justice, check your local supermarkets for someone stocking up on canned goods and ammo.

(via Death and Taxes, image via Paul Jerry)

Previously in the undead

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Dan is many things, including a game developer, animator, martial artist, and at least semi-professional pancake chef. He lives in North Carolina with Lisa Brown (his wife) and Liz Lemon (his dog), both of whom are the best, and he will never stop reminding The Last Jedi's detractors that Luke Skywalker's pivotal moment in Return of the Jedi was literally throwing his lightsaber away and refusing to fight.