If nobody likes you and everybody hates you, maybe you should pick up a few Worms worms to keep you company. I wouldn’t recommend eating them though. At around 7 inches tall (long?) they aren’t quite itsy bitsy, but they are fuzzy-wuzzy.
Available at the GameOn Stuff Facebook store, these plushified, landscape-destroying annelids come in Pirate, Commando, and Classic styles in normal and key-chain varieties. Also, Super Sheep. The larger ones will run you about $12 dollars, whereas the key-chain dudes are about $8. Oh, and sorry Worms 3D naysayers, they haven’t made any 2D Worms felts.