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what is this I don’t even

To Boldly Go

Can We Talk About How Riker Sits on Things?

by Susana Polo | 5:45 pm, May 9th, 2013

If only I weren’t five foot four, I might be able to attempt this level of badassery in my every day life. Sadly, this executing this maneuver, especially in front of one’s superior officer, is recommended to experienced Rikers.

Though, as you can see, the beard is optional.

(via Topless Robot.)

The Future Is Now!

The Inevitable Result of Robot Surgery

by Susana Polo | 5:48 pm, February 28th, 2013

I’ll say up front that I have no particular knowledge of the safety of robot assisted surgery, the long-term health effects, or its impact on the medical and patient community, other than the fact that the Wikipedia article on it has no less than four “issues” listed at the top of it and they’ve all been there since 2010.

What I do know, is that this actual commercial is one step away from an actual Saturday Night Live Sketch, and also that they really, really could have come up with a more serious url than one that implies swatting a roomba with a rolled up newspaper. (Also, I just checked, and badrobotsurgery.tumblr.com is totally available, people.)

(via I Heart Chaos.)

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Holy Rusted Metal Batman!

TV’s Robin, Burt Ward, Comments on Current Robin Events

by Susana Polo | 2:21 pm, February 28th, 2013

It’s a terrible choice to kill off Robin. Why bite the hand that feeds you? … Robin should only die in people’s imaginations! Or in a state of primal ecstasy! — Burt Ward.

Well, I can certainly understand Ward’s distress over the fate of a fictional character that he’s close to, even more when he’s responsible for embodying one of the most iconic versions of that character. Although it’s worth noting that this isn’t the first time this has happened, nor is the current Robin even the same character as the one he played in the television show -

Wait, did he say in a state of primal ecstasy?

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Braaaaiiiinnnnns

Really Weird Cardiac Arrest PSA Takes Place in Zombie Apocalypse

by Susana Polo | 5:41 pm, October 9th, 2012

The point is… the zombies want you alive when they start to eat you. So you know. Try and show a little respect.

(via Topless Robot.)

what is this I don't even

Medieval Baby Making Complete With Hammer (SFW)

by Susana Polo | 10:17 am, September 18th, 2012

Unfortunately, this is a “detail of a miniature depicting Nature forging a baby,” from around the year 1500, not some depiction of what 16th century Dutch people thought human gestation was like.

/sigh I guess history is already awesome enough without that.

(via Retronaut.)

Previously in What Is This I Don’t Even

And So It Begins

Nevermind, Hollywood, Just Keep Making Sequels: Movie About Olympic Swimmer Raised By Whales is Greenlit

by Susana Polo | 4:14 pm, August 28th, 2012

It’s pretty easy to make fun of Hollywood for making nothing but sequels, adaptations, and remakes lately. After all, it’s pretty clear that that’s where the big money is being spent. Just look at the movies that made it into our End-of-Summer Round Up: franchise movies like The Avengers, The Dark Knight Rises, Prometheus and Men in Black III, reboots like The Amazing Spider-Man and Total Recall, and a slew of movies based on licensed products or previously told stories like Battleship, Snow White and the Huntsman and Dark Shadows. The only fully original film there is Brave.

But if this is what we get when Hollywood reaches around for an original idea… how about we just keep making those Spider-Man reboots, huh?

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Today in Depressing

The Most Tragic Tortoise Divorce You’ll Read About All Day

by Kellie Foxx-Gonzalez | 12:02 pm, June 11th, 2012

It seems that even reptiles are susceptible to marital troubles. Two Giant Tortoises at an Austrian zoo have been placed into separate cages after Bibi, the female tortoise, “attacked her partner – biting off a chunk of his shell… until he was moved to another enclosure.” Sick of being cooped up in a cage with her partner Poldi, Bibi seems to have moved on to the single life.

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Vital Information for Your Everyday Life

Dapper Dinosaurs, for All Your Formalwear Needs

by Susana Polo | 3:33 pm, April 4th, 2012

We all know that dinosaurs had it going on in the ruling the earth business for millions of years, but who would have thought that they’d also be creatures of sartorial elegance?

The fully accredited research institution known as Dapper Dinos has a wealth of evidence for this theory, all of it very convincing. We can tell by the pixels.

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A Series of Fallopian Tubes

Realistic Fake Pregnancy Bellies Hot Seller in China?

by Susana Polo | 11:52 am, December 9th, 2011

Man, if China is interested in lifelike pregnancy bellies, I wonder what they’d think of the machine that makes you feel like you’re menstruating? According to the Global Times, whose record of journalistic integrity we don’t have a lot of experience with but we’re letting it slide because this is funny and weird, sales of silica gel (yes, the stuff that comes in shoe boxes and labeled very clearly as inedible) pregnancy bellies have become “hot sellers on the online shopping market.”

The bellies are advertised as “flesh color,” “human skin texture,” and “highly comfortable.”

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Elsewhere on the internet

Just in Time for Halloween: Creepy Human Baby Chewbacca Doll

by Susana Polo | 1:14 pm, October 27th, 2011

See, I had to put the word “human” in the title, or you might have thought I was just talking about a creepy baby wookie doll. But no. No. Han, Luke, and Leia behind the jump.

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