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  1. The Stock Market: Now With 100% More Lasers, Strictly for Communication, of Course

    Buy! Sell! Pew pew!

    If you needed any more evidence that the pace of the stock exchange is blinding, traders on the cutting edge of technology are now making use of military communications lasers to transmit data, because fiber optics and microwaves are just too darn slow. Just nobody tell them light is faster in a vacuum, OK? I like having air to breathe.

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  2. Marijuana Vending Machine Maker’s Stock Skyrockets and Everybody Freaks Out

    Based on this month's election, the idea legalizing marijuana seems more popular than ever. Two states, Washington and Colorado, have legalized pot at the state level. With the legal marijuana market looking stronger than ever, there are companies out there looking to build around big-marijuana when commodity reaches critical mass. For now, most of those companies are waiting in the wings, but not medical supply distribution producer MedBox, which has been thrust into the spotlight. The company, which makes vending machines for hospitals, pharmacies, and “alternative medicine clinics,” has seen their stock price rise by 3,000 percent since the 2012 election. You'd think MedBox' executives would be ecstatic, but in reality, the company is terrified of what will happen now that they've suddenly become so popular on Wall Street.

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