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  1. Fashion Website Uses Disney Princesses to Endorse its Vibrators, Presumably Has Great Legal Team

    Gadgets and gizmos aplenty.

    Forget princesses, I would buy an Ursula or Maleficent marital aid in an instant.

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  2. Crowdfunded Open-Source Vibrating Dildo Seems Like Ambitious Project

    And not just for the user. *rimshot*

    How does one crowd-source a dildo, I wondered, until I realized that the makers of The Mod are actually crowdfunding their toy, and open-sourcing the design. And the design is pretty fancy.

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  3. Things We Saw Today: Hasbro’s Replacement Play-Doh Penis Toy

    Thing that can't be unseen.

    After receiving numerous complaints regarding the questionably-shaped 'Extruder' toy included in Hasbro's new Cake Mountain Set, the company has replaced the phallic device with this new, larger model.

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  4. An Update: Play-Doh Is Redesigning The “Extruder” Toy That Looks Like a Penis

    Goodnight, sweet penis prince.

    Get your accidental penises while you can, folks. According to the official Play-Doh Facebook page—which, you'll no doubt remember, is currently full of complaints from people about how the icing extruder on their latest Cake Mountain playset looks like a penis—they've heard the various complaints and will update their toys in the future.

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  5. Penis-Shaped Play-Doh Toy Ruins Christmas for Uptight People Everywhere

    Since when is penis-making not Play-Doh 101?

    Play-doh had the hard job of doing some damage control on Facebook after what I can only assume was a cock-up in the design phase resulted in a plastic accessory looking less like the Cake Mountain icing maker it was supposed to be and more like a dil-doh.

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  6. Well… Fleshlight Made That iPad Case a Reality (NSFW… Like… at All) [Updated]

    Now you can stop taping them together like a caveman!

    Welcome to the future, folks. The Fleshlight-holding iPad case we first heard rumored back in 2012 is now a reality. Yesterday, Fleshlight announced the LaunchPAD, and it certainly is an iPad case you can attach a Fleshlight too. It sure is that. (Click through for the NSFW details.)

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  7. Tech Perverts, Your Dreams Have Come True: You Can Now Design And 3D Print Your Own Dildo

    Don't look scandalized. You're on the Internet.

    Gone are the days when everyone would sew their own clothes, build their own houses, or, in this case, whittle their own sex toys from wood they chopped down themselves. But if you're looking for just the perfectly tailored fake penis to pleasure yourself with, then take heart! You don't have to go to Etsy for that shit anymore.

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  8. Things We Saw Today: An Upworthy Translator

    Things We Saw Today

    Programmer Snipe created a Chrome addon that translates Upworthy-style titles into more realistic language, and she's shared it with the internet. (Geekosystem)

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  9. Never Lose A Sex Toy Again With This “Pleasure Products Organizer” Kickstarter

    Unless you leave the box open, of course. Then you're on your own.

    Remember when Jennifer Lawrence told everyone about how the maid at her hotel discovered her (TOTALLY bougbt as a joke, of course) sex toys once? You should, because the video only went up yesterday. She used the phrase "copious amounts of butt plugs," if we remember correctly. Apparently there's an easy way to stop that from happening.

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  10. Jennifer Lawrence Talked About Her “Copious Amount” of Butt Plugs on Conan

    We're just... uhm... just... we're just gonna leave this here.

    Ooccasionally Jennifer Lawrence travels with what she described as a "copious amount" of butt plugs. She recounted the tale of one such sex toy adventure on Conan last night. Considering it's a clip from a television show, it's technically safe for work, but Lawrence does say "butt plug" like a buuuunch of times.

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  11. The Mary Sue Received An Interesting Superhero Package In The Mail Today (NSFW)

    My Spidey Sense Is Tingling

    So interesting, in fact, we can't post an image of it on our front page. If you'd like to find out what it is, click ahead but be forewarned: NOT SAFE FOR WORK. 

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  12. NSFW: Black Widow & Hawkeye Aren’t Left Out Of This Fake Avengers Sex Toy Line

    My Spidey Sense Is Tingling

    Did we say Not Safe For Work? NSFW! Tumblr user Sarmai created "6 pieces of pleasure" based on the characters from Marvel's The Avengers. When we saw them we made this face and figured you might enjoy them if we shared. And by "enjoy" we don't mean actually enjoy, because these aren't real. But if they were, I have a feeling they'd fly off the shelves faster than then you can say, Excelsior!

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  13. Things We Saw Today: A New Poster for Pacific Rim

    Things We Saw Today

    Pacific Rim, I honestly cannot tell if that tagline is the worst thing or the best thing. (Think McFly Think)

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  14. Things We Saw Today: A Belated Lois Lane Birthday Cake

    Things We Saw Today

    Our 2nd birthday was at the end of February but WHO CARES Ant at Nerdache Cakes dedicated this Lois Lane cake to us. It's a good thing we only have pictures so we don't have to feel conflicted about destroying its aesthetic appeal in order to devour it. She's got lots more pictures of it at her Tumblr.

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  15. If Ikea Made Vibrators, They’d Probably Make ’em Like This

    Once More With Feeling

    The Gäsm is a limited production vibrator made from 100% recycled materials, including repurposed rubber and compressed wood pulp. And even though it comes disassembled with instructions, and its batteries can be recharged by winding it with an included allen wrench, it is not made by Ikea. It's made by LELO, a manufacturer in high-end sex toys. But while it's only available for order until April 1st, it's not a joke product. Okay, it's at least partly a joke product, look at it, but, I mean, it's an actual thing that you can buy. And probably functions as well, but just to make sure, we reached out to our new official sex-toy expert, Iris Explosion, whose day job is working for Babeland, a lady-owned and founded chain of adult toy stores.

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  16. Model Rocket of the Day: Actually Not a Rocket; Actually a Vibrator

    Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

    There's an argument to be made that all vibrators count as "do it yourself projects," but this vibrator (which Google Translate insists is called the Hyper Dash rotor) really is a do it yourself project. See, it comes in a bunch of separate plastic pieces waiting to be cut out of plastic trusses, just like that model Gundam you're so proud of. Observe:

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  17. This Mouse “Feels Just As Good In Your Hand As It Does On Your Body,” If You’re Into That

    Chocolate and peanut butter. Pizza and beer. Sriracha and anything. The list of great tastes that taste great together just got a little bit longer with the introduction of the Massager Mouse. Yes, that is exactly what it sounds like -- a computer mouse that also functions as a personal massager. The mouse, which is currently showing at EroFame, Europe's premier trade show for adult toys -- and we're not talking tablet computers -- can help you click your way around a database, then switch gears at the press of a button to massage the stress out of sore muscles in your neck, shoulders and, uh, other parts.

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  18. Things We Saw Today: Where Our Knowledge of British Culture Comes From

    Things We Saw Today

    No, but seriously: we watch Sherlock, too. (Doctor Who on Tumblr)

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  19. Things We Saw Today: An MST3K Headboard

    Things We Saw Today

    Now, the Satellite of Love crew can provide commentary on your dreams ... and maybe also your bed activities. Good idea? Or best idea? (via Boing Boing)

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  20. This is the TARDIS Flying Through the Time Vortex in Dildo Form

    Today in your weird sci-fi sex toy news, we have this dildo that represents the time vortex, complete with TARDIS flying along through it, dubbed the TARDIS Tickler. Obviously, sci-fi sex toys aren't exactly a bare market, but I'm not entirely sure if any sex toy has ever tried to represent the whole of space and time until now. Obviously, there are some NSFW images below the break.

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