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Microsoft

  1. Sunset Overdrive Is Free Tomorrow for Xbox Live Gold Members to Celebrate Xbox One’s Birthday

    Isn't it traditional to receive gifts on one's—you know what? Nevermind.

    The Xbox One got you a gift to celebrate its first birthday! Shh, it's young and doesn't know how birthdays work. Nobody correct it, and maybe we can get gifts like this every year.

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  2. Microsoft Deploys Freaking Dalek Security Robots, Never Has to Worry About Theft Again

    "Do you validate parking?" "VAL-I-DATE! VAL-I-DAAAAAATE!"

    Wow. I wish Microsoft took personal computer security as seriously as they clearly do in the physical world at their offices. Their Silicon Valley campus now has five security robots that look frighteningly like Daleks. Leave it to a bunch of nerds to assume the appearance of a Dalek will strike fear into the hearts of criminals.

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  3. A Five-Year-Old Passed the Microsoft IT Technician Exam. Seriously.

    So easy a kid can do it!

    Either the bar for being a Microsoft IT tech is so low a child can clear it, or five-year-old Ayan Qureshi is a genius. Luckily for IT people everywhere, it seems that young Qureshi is just very smart, but until he builds Skynet or whatever's in store for his brilliant future, I'm still open to the possibility that Microsoft tech support is secretly just five-year-olds.

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  4. We Played Sunset Overdrive and More at Its Star-Studded Launch Party, and It Was FUN

    It was like some kind of... awesomepocalypse.

    While I can't speak for how Sunset Overdrive is as a full game, I did get to play it a bit last night along with a bunch of famous people I have no business being in the same room with, and it was a blast. I also played a bit of Assassin's Creed Unity, and I'll do my best to tell you about that, too—despite how awful I am at it. Hey, you try focusing on gaming with Michelle Hurst AKA Miss Claudette watching.

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  5. Male Microsoft CEO Tells Women To Trust In “Karma” and “The System” Instead Of Asking For A Raise

    Don't let the glass ceiling hit you on the way down, dude.

    Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella spoke yesterday at the annual Grace Hopper Celebration event honoring women in tech. He shouldn't have.

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  6. Officially Official: Microsoft Buying Minecraft and Its Developer for $2.5 Billion, Creator Leaving the Company

    What do you think Mojang will build with all that gold?

    Reports were creeping around the Internet last week that Microsoft was looking to buy Minecraft developer Mojang, along with the game itself, for $2 billion. The sale is now officially happening with an even ridiculously higher price tag of $2.5 billion, and we're one step closer to every tech company just buying every other tech company until there's a giant tech mega-corporation that rules the world... and builds everything out of poorly-textured cubes.

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  7. BREAKING: Microsoft Looks to Be Buying Minecraft For a Lot of Money

    The Wall Street Journal is saying Microsoft is working on a deal to purchase Mojang AB, makers of Minecraft. Guess how much they're reportedly offering...

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  8. Xbox Kinect Can Be Used to Collect Crime Scene Data, Help Police… Kinect the Dots

    ( •_•)>⌐■-■ ... (⌐■_■) YYYYEEEEAAAAAHHHHH!

    No stone has been left unturned in the quest to find something, anything, that the Xbox Kinect is good for, and it may have paid off: The Kinect seems pretty useful for investigating crime scenes. I can only guess that it wound up in this role after its prominent part in the case of how the PS4 murdered the Xbox One.

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  9. Looks Like You’ll Be Able to Preview Windows 9 Next Month If That’s What You’re Into

    No judgment.

    Microsoft is quickly moving towards the next version, but if they're not moving quickly enough for you, you can get your hands on the software early with a Windows 9 preview.

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  10. News and Video Replay From Microsoft’s Gamescom 2014 Xbox Press Conference

    The press conference is Xbox Done.

    Microsoft held their Gamescom press conference at the unholy early hour of 8AM ET, but we'll forgive them, since Gamescom is in Germany. If you missed it, you can catch the full replay with tons of gameplay footage and post-show coverage, or you can take a look at the highlights below.

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