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Judgment Day

  1. The UK’s Robot Soldier “Porton Man” Can Sense Chemical Warfare (and Probably Also Your Fear)

    His Schwarzenegger skin-suit must not be ready yet.

    If you thought the US was the only country building an army of robot nightmares, the UK's Porton Man robot soldier will assure you that no corner of the globe is safe from uncanny valley-fueled horror. Guys, I'm pretty sure they robots will make their own soldiers once they reach sentience. No need to help.

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  2. Robot Modeled After Human Looks Just Like a Human, is Creepy [Video]

    The above video is that of a robot. Not a human dressed up as a robot, as it may seem. Created by Actroid company Kokoro and professor at Osaka University Hiroshi Ishiguro, and modeled after Associate Professor Henrik Scharfe of Aalborg University in Denmark, the robot seen in the video is a Geminoid DK, part of the Geminoid series of realistic androids. The reason why the robot's movements and expressions seem so realistic is because they are controlled by an operator who uses a motion-capture and facial-tracking system.

    The supposed point of the realistic androids is study "emotional affordances" in human-robot interaction, as well as to study the perception of robots between different cultures, though we can all pretty easily see through that, can't we? Head on past the break to see another video of an android that looks like a human if you watch said video while looking at your keyboard.

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  3. Robot Arm Will Not Be Stopped By Your Pitiful Hammer [Video]

    You can't have an indestructible robot army bent on overthrowing the human race without indestructible robot arms, and the engineers at DLR have brought us one step further on that road. The latest profoundly unnerving piece of tech from the German robotics lab is a fully articulated robot arm that can manipulate objects, flip the bird, withstand glancing blows from a hammer, and get creamed with a metal baseball bat, all without missing a beat. Granted, this is pretty neat in principle, and a sturdier robot arm means a sturdier robot butler/more capable indentured robot assassin down the road. But it's a bit troubling for anyone who is planning on having to battle legions of robots for their very lives in the next 20 years or so. Which is to say, people who are prepared for the inevitable future. (via Robots.net)

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  4. The Tie-mernator [Video]

    When a tie needs to be tied, you send in an expert to take care of that. A robot whose soul function is to tie a necktie would probably fit the bill. Artist Seth Goldstein created this kinectic sculpture that elegantly ties, unties, then reties ad infinitum. Artistically, it's a fascinating demonstration of a simple task recreated with technology. For us, it's just awesome. Rube Goldberg would be proud. (via Geekologie)

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  5. Cyberdyne Actually Exists on Real Life Earth and Builds Robots

    Um, good news ... ?: Japan-based research and development company Cyberdyne, which sounds familiar because it's not supposed to be real, has developed exoskeleton technology for humans that is controlled by human thoughts. The up-side: It allows people with little to no function in their legs to walk, using sensors that detect muscular stimulation when the brain thinks of it. The weird-side: What is a company called Cyberdyne doing creating though-controlled human exoskeletons?

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  6. Obama Administration Proposes Unique Internet ID for Every American

    In the coming months, the Obama administration is planning on passing a new proposal, the National Strategy for Trusted Identities in Cyberspace, to the U.S. Commerce Department regarding a national "cybersecurity measure" that will aim to give each U.S. citizen their own unique Internet ID, but U.S. Commerce Secretary Gary Locke assures us, "We are not talking about a national ID card." Head on past the break to see if Locke can assuage your fears of Big Brother watching your every cyber-move.

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  7. Robots Can Juggle Now

    Yet another addition to the coming robot apocalypse, this robot juggles two ping-pong balls using a ping-pong paddle, machinery, fancy algorithms, and probably a little bit of witchcraft. Does anyone else sense the new villain for Paint the Line 3?

    (via Geekologie)

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  8. Quadrocopters Now Play the Piano, Probably to Lull Us Into False Sense of Security [Video]

    The Flying Machine Arena unleashed one of their quadrocopters (that will undoubtedly play a significant role in the coming robot apocalypse), named "Echo," for the holidays to play a merry song on the piano, probably in order to trick us into thinking quadrocopters are harmless. We know better, though.

    The irony of having something that will help bring about the end of humanity share a name with someone else who took part in an apocalypse isn't lost on this terrified human. No sir.

    (via Engadget)

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  9. Robot Given Knife, Taught to Debone Ham: Next Step, Us?!

    A knife-wielding robot named HAMDAS-R, developed by Mayekawa Electric, has been taught to debone a ham, probably because pig bodies are used in various experiments when using a human body wouldn't be appropriate, and learning to debone a ham is the best way for robots to learn how to debone a human without raising too many alarms. HAMDAS-R can debone 500 hams in an hour and can easily discern between meat and bone, making it an extremely efficient human-fillet machine whenever it rises up against its human oppressors (i.e. us).

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  10. Scientists Teach Robots Human Pain Threshold, Scientific Geniuses are Dumb

    In an effort to teach robots how to avoid hurting human beings, professor Borut Povse in Slovenia taught robots how to hurt human beings. The logic behind it states that robots won't know how not to hurt human beings without knowing our pain threshold, at which point they can realize when to stop.

    All I want to know is: Stop doing what to me?

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