When the tortured and bloodied bodies of adolescents strewn willy-nilly across a widescreen isn’t the thing making you uncomfortable in a theater, you know something, somewhere has gone wrong. Based on the camp classic original, (more about that in a moment) the new Evil Dead, in a surprising homage to the film that ‘inspired’ it, is a movie that isn’t aware that it’s bad. A tonal slog that’s a bare-faced unpleasant time (and in not the way it’s intended), Evil Dead has some good cringe-worthy moments, and some things about it that just made me cringe. Read on for a chilling tale of guts, gore, false advertising, VFX lauding, and how the tired trope of casual sexism can be a real bore.

Contains spoilers, as well as some specific mentions of R-rated gory violence. Chances are, if you weren’t going to watch the films for the sake of your tastes or stomach, you might not want to read this.

I think everyone at one point or another has wondered how they’d fare in a slasher movie. Personally, I’d like to think that I’d snap into badass mode fairly quickly and make it to the end, busting a few heads along the way. But something tells me I’d be killed fairly early on. I’ll (hopefully) never know.

But those in the Los Angeles area (or those willing to travel there) can find out courtesy of the Great Horror Campout, a summer camp that lets you live the horror movie experience. Without, y’know. Actually dying.

If you’re unfamiliar with Kill Bill, it’s a two part Quentin Tarantino series featuring Uma Thurman as the Bride, neé Beatrix Kiddo, an assassin newly awakened from a coma who sets out to kill all the people who put her in it and took her unborn child, including the child’s father, Bill. In some of the most famous fight scenes in the series, she wears a yellow tracksuit with black stripes,while Flight of the Bumblebee plays in the background.

If you’re unfamiliar with parasite wasps, they’re the xenomorphs of the wasp world, in the genus Braconidae. Every insect in Braconidae has one thing in common: they lay their eggs in the sometimes still living bodies of their prey, so that when the babies hatch they’re already inside their first meal. New species Cystomastacoides kiddo has indeed been named after Beatrix, and yes, it is indeed bright yellow.

Ohhh, so this is why everyone is so scared of the “Fake Geek Girl.” I get it now. Totally legit problem we absolutely need to do something about. But seriously, Patrick Willems does a great job at poking fun at the controversy, and uses some real internet comments to do it. (We’ve seen a similar take on this before actually.)

(via Slate)

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The Carrie remake has a new release date, October of this year, and that was probably a good idea. Scary things and October just make sense and all indications point to Carrie being very, very scary. For instance, this new poster featuring Carrie’s mom played by Julianne Moore. I’ll be under my covers if anyone needs me.

(via Empire Online)

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I may or may not have squealed when I saw illustrator Laurent Durieux‘s The Iron Giant poster. And then I got a little emotional. Because that’s what I do when I’m confronted with anything The Iron Giant-related, OK? But once I got myself under control I was able to look at and fully appreciate some of Durieux’s other posters, and let me tell you—they are amazing. I’m not as well-versed in classic horror movies as I would like to be, but this art made me want to go and watch everything. (And rewatch The Bride of Frankenstein, because it’s excellent and deserves it.)

If you’ve watched even one episode of AMC’s The Walking Dead, you know blood is on the agenda. And not just a few drops. Usually it’s spraying or gushing. But unlike the AMC show, Robert Kirkman’s comic is actually presented in black and white. So the channel has decided to give us a special treat by airing the episodes the same way.

Kids. Sometimes they’re sweet, sometimes they’re bratty, and sometimes they’re evil hellions… literally. Though that tends to happen more in the movies than in real life. Here, CollegeHumor gives us a look at a very specialized daycare, where a friendly horror movie Mary Poppins (no, not this one) has to deal with all the creepy children from The Shining, The Exorcist, Ringu, The Omen, Children of the Corn, and the like. Better her than me. She’s better at evil chanting from The Evil Dead‘s Necronomicon than I am. (Not for lack of trying, I might add.)

(via: Laughing Squid)

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It turns out that watching horror movies helps you burns calories… but not enough calories to offset a giant bowl of butter-drenched popcorn, so this news isn’t nearly as good as it seems on the surface.

A study conducted by researchers at the University of Westminster found that the increased heart rate that results from watching a horror movie will burn approximately the same amount of calories as a half-hour walk… which also happens to be less than what’s in a normal-sized bar of chocolate, but whatever, I’ll take it.

I’ve never been much of a horror movie buff, and this was never more clear to me than when my Film 101 professor announced that the second half of the semester would be on her particular field of research: movies that cause visceral changes in the viewer. I.e., the horrifying or revolting. And let me tell you: you don’t necessarily need a slick looking monster to get people to scream. Just look at The Tingler.

Ok, but seriously, what’s up with that lamp.

(via Flavorwire, who has the full list of movies included here.)