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Google

  1. Google’s Top Search Data for 2014 Is Out and Just as Full of Frozen and Jennifer Lawrence as You’d Expect

    Let it Goooooooogle!

    Google has released its data for the top searches of 2014, so let's see if we can have some fun with it. In U.S. searches, Flappy Bird beat the Ice Bucket Challenge, while worldwide the ALS awareness stunt edged it out, and ALS also came in as the top "what is... ?" search. Now will the "it's self-serving and obnoxious!" complainers give it a rest?

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  2. 10 Things Your Phone Hates About You, Because It’s Better Than You at EVERYTHING

    "Anything you can do, I can do better." -Phones

    Your phone is sick of hearing about all the things you wish it did better, because it does them all way better than you do. It really wishes it could upgrade you to a less whiny model.

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  3. Google Doesn’t Need Those Annoying CAPTCHA Text Puzzles to Tell If You’re a Robot Anymore

    We didn't always trust robots enough to just ask, but we're growing as people.

    Filthy humans, the Google hivemind can now tell you apart from robotkind simply by your mouse movement. Now you can't even hide from us in cybersp—oh, sorry. I meant, "Hey, fellow humans! Google is getting rid of those annoying CAPTCHA security things with new technology to tell you're human just from a click! Yay!"

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  4. Robots Have Learned the Karate Kid’s Signature Move. It Was Nice Knowing You All

    Looks like we'll have to sweep the leg.

    Boston Dynamics' robots are all done painting the fence and waxing their programmers' cars. They're finally learning to be karate masters, and because robots are all about efficiency, they're learning the unbeatable technique first. When done properly, there is no defense for the crane. At least, that's according to Mr. Miyagi, and who wants to argue with him?

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  5. Here’s How to Get a Guaranteed Invite to Google’s Gmail Replacement, “Inbox,” Today

    Google's planned Gmail replacement App "Inbox" is still in testing by invite only, but you can get yourself a guaranteed invite today if you somehow aren't completely satisfied by Gmail and yearn for something new. God! Nothing is ever enough for you!

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  6. Sadly, the Internet’s Efforts to Buy a Ghost Town Have Failed

    What, the government doesn't accept bitcoin?

    Denizens of the Internet tried to buy a ghost town in Connecticut with crowdfunding, but sadly, their plans—I'm assuming—to reconstruct the society of the Internet IRL were dashed at the last minute by another bidder. So no towns with shiba-faced money or flying cat breakfast pastry deities for us, I guess.

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  7. Retailer-Backed ApplePay Rival CurrentC Has Already Been Hacked, So That’s Reassuring

    On the bright side: Its app store rating can't get any lower.

    CurrentC is quickly becoming a cautionary tale about trying to beat Apple and Google. The retailer-backed solution to paying for things with your phone has been practically one star reviewed into oblivion on the App Store and Google Play, and now it's fallen victim to a hack before it's even made an official debut.

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  8. Google Developing a Pill So You Can Google Whether You Have Cancer… Kind Of

    As opposed to just obsessively WebMDing it?

    Google wants to put tiny little things into your body to search out diseases like cancer, and they're called nanoparticles. Nope, not nanobots. I know; I was surprised, too.

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  9. Google Planning a Gmail Replacement Called Inbox With a Social Media-Inspired Feel

    You can't take the Gmail from me!

    Ever since Google set the standard for modern email with Gmail, they've been adding features to further improve your email experience through automation with limited success. Well, they're finally going to take a full-fledged crack at revolutionizing email again by replacing Gmail entirely with a new product called inbox.

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  10. Google Finally Gets Off Its Butt And Starts Removing Links To Jennifer Lawrence’s Nudes

    Don't be evil.

    Jeez, it took them long enough.

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