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  1. Baby Poop Might Help Make Sausage Healthier, Tastier, and Way Grosser

    Who found this out and why?

    Baby poop is being used by scientists to improve sausage. Thankfully, it's not an ingredient, but they did study a bunch of dirty diapers to sample and culture bacteria, and that bacteria could make sausages not only tastier, but healthier. You know, if you can get over the idea of poop-sausage and actually eat it.

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  2. Smart Diapers Track a Baby’s Health with Smartphones, Because Why Shouldn’t Diapers Make Themselves Useful?

    There's a diaper app! Oh, it doesn't change the baby's diaper? Disappointing.

    Smart diapers bring obsessing over infant health to a new level by letting you check up on your baby's vital stats with your smart phone. The diaper has a small patch that tests urine and gives you all kinds of pee information to overreact about and bother doctors with. Oh, and it can detect early signs of infection and diabetes, so that's good.

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  3. There’s a Kickstarter Campaign so Everyone Can Have Adorable LED Babies Next Year

    Someday you, too, can have a baby stick figure running around your house saying baby things.

    Royce Hutain, creator of the LED baby stick figure costume, is back with more video of his daughter on their trick-or-treating rounds to announce the costume's Kickstarter campaign. Hutain hopes to get the costume into stores in time for Halloween at prices of under $30 for kid and pet costumes. Yes, you can have stick figure pets.

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  4. Best-Dad-Ever Made His Baby Daughter an Adorable LED Halloween Costume [Video]

    This may unintentionally be the first XKCD Halloween costume we've ever seen. It's also the best.

    If you ever wanted to watch an incredibly cute, glowing stick figure run around and talk baby-talk, this is the video for you. Seriously, we could watch it all day. As a bonus, it really reminds us of the stick figures from the webcomic XKCD.

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  5. Watch Tons of News Anchors Making Same Dated “Yeah, Baby” Joke About Mike Myers’ Baby [Video]

    It's especially silly when you consider that this is not even his first child.

    Mike Myers and Kelly Tisdale are expecting their second child, and local news stations showed solidarity by announcing it with the same dated Austin Powers reference. Luckily, Conan made a compilation video that turns it from sad to hilarious.

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  6. KinderStuff Launches Secondhand Kids’ Fashion Company Online, Sounds Vaguely Familiar

    If you're a regular reader of the site, you know I'm a new father. That's probably why KinderStuff caught my attention. My daughter is less than a month old, and she's already outgrown a lot of the Batman outfits she has. Don't worry, she has more, but it raises the issue that children quickly outgrow clothing, so parents are constantly having to buy new clothes. New online clothing company KinderStuff offers premium, organic clothing, and when your kid outgrows it, you can send it back for a discount on new clothes. The site launched in the U.S. today. Letting kids wear high-end garments for a limited time? Where have I heard that before...

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  7. Incestuous, Meth Smoking Washington Couple Arrested on Charges of Being Worst People Ever

    A woman and her boyfriend -- who is also her half-brother, for those of you working to fill out your "Degenerates on the Internet" bingo card at home -- were arrested in Lake Stevens, Washington earlier this month for smoking meth in their car. The official charge, though, was child endangerment, because of course the woman's 11 month old baby was  with them in the frigid, out of gas, meth smoke-filled car. As if you even needed to ask.

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  8. Hide Yo Kids, Hide Yo Wife, Fake Eagles Snatchin’ Everybody Out Here

    Death from the skies! There's a video on YouTube right now that allegedly shows a golden eagle swooping down in a park and attempting to carry off a small child. Golden eagles are one of the largest birds in North America, but could one actually lift a baby? Nope. They can't. There were few things about this video that made us suspicious, and with good reason. It turns out it was fake after all.

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  9. Baby Fighting A Dragon Ends Better For The Baby Than You Might Expect

    The above video aside, we here at Geekosystem want to register our strong disapproval of teaching dangerous martial arts techniques to small children. Ignoring for a moment the obvious dangers inherent in a child being able to beat up its own teachers, babysitters, and parents, the training necessary to master these skills is more than any small child should have to bear. Unless dragons are a problem in your neighborhood. At that point it's just responsible parenting.

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  10. This Assault Rifle Is Made Of Baby, And We Want To Know Who’s Responsible

    It looks like someone tore a baby apart and wrapped it around an assault rifle. The blood bag could mean it is still alive. The leash could mean it tried to escape. We have so many questions, but no one seems to have the answers.

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