Piers Morgan is no stranger to futile Twitter wars and regressive political commentary, but he had a particularly terrible day yesterday when he tried to come for J.K. Rowling. It all started when he appeared on Friday’s episode of Real Time With Bill Maher. After Morgan said, “There is no Muslim ban,” comedian Jim Jefferies cried out, “Oh, fuck off!”
J.K. Rowling, who has repeatedly criticized Morgan’s politics, was delighted by Jefferies’ outburst.
Yes, watching Piers Morgan being told to fuck off on live TV is *exactly* as satisfying as I’d always imagined. https://t.co/4FII8sYmIt
— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) February 11, 2017
Morgan then responded by claiming he had never read the Harry Potter books. (Your loss, bro.)
This is why I’ve never read a single word of Harry Potter. https://t.co/XUJBMs4KKm
— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) February 11, 2017
That’s when Rowling, George Takei, and the internet’s love of receipts came for Morgan.
Because you had a premonition that one day the author would roar with laughter at seeing you called out for your bullshit on live TV? https://t.co/8rkKSqJTnG
— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) February 11, 2017
No, it’s because you lack imagination, and small children instinctively fear you. @jk_rowling https://t.co/TIPg8POLQ6
— George Takei (@GeorgeTakei) February 11, 2017
Man who claims to have never read a word of Harry Potter quotes liberally from Harry Potter book https://t.co/DhSD0bck9q
— Barry Glendenning (@bglendenning) February 11, 2017
Morgan then tried to make some point about liberal arrogance and superiority, but Rowling–who regularly slam-dunks on Twitter’s misogynists and homophobes, and once staged a tag-team Twitter takedown of Trump with Carrie Fisher–just mimed him.
The superior, dismissive arrogance of rabid Remain/Clinton supporters like @jk_rowling is, of course, precisely why both campaigns lost.
— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) February 11, 2017
The fact-free, amoral, bigotry-apologism of celebrity toady Piers Morgan is, of course, why it’s so delicious to see him told to fuck off. https://t.co/4XNF4G0nlD
— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) February 11, 2017
Morgan quickly flew off the rails with some petty tweets…that betrayed quite a working knowledge of Harry Potter lore. I mean, characters like Voldemort or Dumbledore are well-established references in mainstream culture, but Squib? Dolores Umbridge? Somebody’s been sneaking a read!
‘I write about Hogwarts, Squibs and Muggles, so anyone who doesn’t agree with my politics can F**K OFF!’ – @jk_rowling
— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) February 11, 2017
No bigger bullies right now than the shrieking, hysterical anti-Trump celebrity brigade.
You lost, so suck it up Dolores. https://t.co/RFQkyJWxZ5— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) February 11, 2017
Morgan then continued to fight with randos in his mentions, as one does.
Of course, all this fun comes with caveats. Even when he’s being an unfunny puppet for racist policies, Morgan shouldn’t be harassed on Twitter–so let’s everyone keep slinging the brutal comebacks, not the Twitter-egg threats. Rowling, though a vocal advocate for many progressive causes, is often an imperfect or tone-deaf ally. Neither Morgan nor Rowling will be personally affected by the horrible ban that kicked off this Twitter feud, so their voices are hardly the most important in this debate.
And yes, it’s true that petty Twitter wars won’t bring us any real political change–but I’m still smiling.
To close, I will leave you with this particularly savage brag, which reminds us all that Rowling is a queen of two art forms: the novel and the Twitter feud.
#StillHurts pic.twitter.com/28rUHy2McC
— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) February 11, 2017
(Via Daily Dot; image via Bloomsbury)
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