Being bad at video games is the new being good. YouTube user NotEntirelySure shows us what it takes to be skillfully awful at Super Mario Bros. and set a new record for the lowest-scoring playthrough at a mere 600 points. No deaths. NotEntirelySure didn’t use any save states or slowdowns, but did use a few glitches and tricks to achieve the impressively terrible score:
In 4-2, I backwards jump into a few obstacles to scroll the screen without Mario to trick the pipe into taking me to the vine’s usual location. In 8-1, I have to perform a pretty precise jump off a goomba to avoid some coins. Also, getting under the first set of 2 coins towards the end of this level takes a very careful jump, and always makes me nervous. In 8-4, I scroll the screen to just the right position to allow me to use some blocks as platforms. No wall jumps are required in this run at all.
Like that episode of South Park, NotEntirelySure practiced being bad. Could the “lowest score run” replace the speedrun? Probably not, but it sure is a lot more interesting. One can only assume that, at some point, this kind of scoring system will become a future game’s actual scoring system. Wait. That’s kind of golf, right?