Not content with owning you and everything you do (probably), Google has purchased Boston Dynamics; you know, the engineering company famous for making terrifying robots that will likely bring about the Skynet-pocalypse.
Based in Waltham, Massachusetts, Boston Dynamics has been contracted by the Pentagon and DARPA to develop “research robots” (lol k), and is well-known around the globe for creating machines able to move in ways both insanely fast and incredibly life-like.
Let’s re-introduce you to PETMAN, who is not any less scary when set to “Eye of the Tiger”:
Andy Rubin, head of Google’s robotics unit, has helped the corporation purchase eight robotics companies in the last six months – but is remaining silent about the true purpose behind the internet giant’s acquisitions.
Sure, it’s probably just to fly people their online orders via drone or something; but, hi, have you seen the Boston Dynamics robot that can literally run faster than Usain Bolt?
That’s what the end looks like, kids.
That, except with the Google Chrome logo for eyes.
- Boston Dynamics’s Wildcat will doom humanity
- Their PETMAN (yeah) has a head, can look at you
- And their BigDog can toss cinder blocks (probably at your head)