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Olden Lore

We Are Getting Another Garbage Pail Kids Movie, Older Young People Rejoice

In somewhat strange news, it was announced that Michael Eisner‘s production company, The Tornante Company, is developing a movie for the 1980s gross-out trading card characters, the Garbage Pail Kids. This will actually be their second movie; there was a live-action version made in 1987, and I could have used that as the top pic, but it was really off-putting. (Hence Loogie Leia, because: geek relevance!) Because it was Garbage Pail Kids IRL. So, awesome! I had no idea there was a huge call for this, but sure! Garbage Pail Kids movie!

The news from Deadline does not reveal if this is going to be another live-action movie like the original, which looked like a grotesque romp featuring a motley band of deformed doll-children who all look like versions of Chuckie (of whom I am terrified). But it will be directed by PES, who is currently making the internet rounds with his short film, Fresh Guacamole, and written by Michael Vukadinovich, who just sold his script The Three Misfortunes of Geppetto to Fox.

For those unfamiliar with the Garbage Pail Kids, they were a symbol of badassery in the late 1980s. If you were one of those kids who were trying to find a grosser, more demented answer to the wildly popular (and innocent) Cabbage Patch Kids — or torture girls who had Cabbage Patch Kids — then these were the cards you brought to school with you, which you traded during super-secret, under-the-table dealings when the teacher was writing on the blackboard. They were a direct parody of the Cabbage Patch Dolls (which actually may have taken over the world in the early 1980s) and were created in 1985 by Pulitzer Prize-winning cartoonist Art Spiegelman. And they were weird. And disgusting. They pushed every limit, crossed every line, and they were what the cool kids who smoked cigarettes behind the school had their hands on “back in the day.” Here are some pictures:

So, we are getting another Garbage Pail Kids movie, and anyone who was in grade school in the 1980s will surely be excited … or we’ll just think, “Uhhhhh, sure! I guess I’ll go see that … on an empty stomach … Maybe!”

(via Deadline)

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  • Anonymous

    I’m kinda glad this is going to be a Eisner film and not say the guys from Twisted Pictures. Ugh just thinking about a GPK/SAW movie makes my stomach turn. I get that these GPKs are suppose to be gross but, I think with Eisner we will get more of an eww eww than an OMG WTF WHHHYYYY!?

  • Jessica Claire

    This is actually super funny to me…I used to have tons of GPK cards when I was in like fourth grade.  Now they kind of ick me out, but they still have their novelty.

  • Frodo Baggins

    Spiegelmen and PES are fantastic. Surely their talents could be put to better use?

  • Adam Whitley

    Nothing is better than Garbage Kids….well the cards at least no idea whey they’d make yet another terrible movie based off something that wasn’t a story though technically it worked for Mars Attacks.

  • Smoke Tetsu

    On the one hand I hope this turns out well on the other hand it is B-movie farefodder in general. But hey those can be fun and I like watching b-movies. The original didn’t turn out too well but it did sort of have that 80′s live action people in puppet suits feel to it which I liked. This one will probably be full of CGI though. 

  • Frodo Baggins

    As far as I’m concerned, that’s not a persuasive example of a film that “worked.”

  • Anna B

    I hated the Garbage Pail Kids. There was a kid in my 1st grade class that used to bully me constantly and she always had a stack of Garbage Pail Kids cards in her hand. When she wasn’t bullying me, she was showing all the other kids her stupid cards. I told her I thought her Garbage Pail Kids were ugly and that she looked like her Garbage Pail Kids, which of course made her clobber me.

  • Emily Hill

    I was born at the end of the eighties so I was never lucky to get the cards but I can tell you I have loved them so much cause I am that weird chick who wants gross out or horror over the stupid romantic comedy any day