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Misleading Headline of the Day

Misleading Headline of the Day

New Footage From Highly Anticipated Film Adaptation of Beloved Children’s Novels

by Susana Polo | 3:18 pm, July 8th, 2011

The actual full trailer for this movie, while it contains some things that are jarring (CGI Honey), almost manages to completely awaken our nostalgia.

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Misleading Headline of the Day

Torchwood Producer Russel T. Davies Assures Us All That Captain Jack Isn’t Gay

by Alanna Bennett | 3:32 pm, June 21st, 2011

Russel T. Davies, Torchwood: Miracle Day producer and co-writer, is very adamant that the world know that Captain Jack Harkness is not gay. Which upon first listen can lead to a giant “WTF,” because, well. Don’t get up in arms too quickly, however: Davies quickly clarifies, and he is simply worried that he spent too much time playing up the character’s homosexual leanings (we’re not complaining) that they neglected the heterosexual side. After all, as Davies tells AfterElton, Captain Jack is omnisexual.

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Misleading Headline of the Day

Scientists Plan to Create Dinosaur Franken-Chickens

by Alanna Bennett | 1:58 pm, June 8th, 2011

Mwahahahahahahahahahaha! That is the noise I imagine the mad scientists who thought up this latest bit of badass insanity made when they hatched their plan to create dinosaurs out of chickens. If you’ve seen Jurassic Park, you know that all you need to create your very own dinosaur is a tiny bit of DNA extracted from an ancient fossilized mosquito. Unfortunately, that is completely false. Fortunately, however, famed paleontologist Jack Horner and his loyal band of minions fellow scientists have come up with the theory that, if you regress chicken DNA far enough back (aka about 10 million years), it could have a very similar effect.

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Misleading Headline of the Day

Florida Senate Bans Sex… But Only From a Purely Technical Taxonomic Viewpoint

by Susana Polo | 10:33 am, May 12th, 2011

The Florida State Senate recently passed a law making bestiality illegal, at least by October 1st of this year. At least, the law is one “prohibiting knowing sexual conduct or sexual contact with an animal; prohibiting specified related activities; providing penalties; providing that the act does not apply to certain husbandry, conformation judging, and veterinary practices” (which means we assume you can still go through the motions necessary to create vital ingredients for veterinary artificial insemination, as in the case of endangered species and livestock).

However, anyone familiar with the taxonomic definition of the word “animal” will realize that humans are included, which means that in a strictly taxonomic sense, Floridians better get all the hanky-panky out of their systems by the end of September, because after that humans having sex with other humans will be illegal. Fortunately, in a strictly legal sense, the sense that matters… the law isn’t that horrifically stupid.

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Misleading Headline of the Day

Mark Ruffalo Previews His Hulk Character [Video]

by Jamie Frevele | 10:59 am, April 28th, 2011

MTV News got a super duper, ultra inside look at Mark Ruffalo as the Hulk, which he will be playing in The Avengers next year. Judging by this clip, I think we should all expect to be nothing less than Totally Blown Away.

(Comics Beat)

Misleading Headline of the Day

Al Qaeda Launches a Women’s Magazine

by Jamie Frevele | 2:46 pm, March 14th, 2011

Um, just a warning, but the following is not a parody: Al-Qaeda has launched a magazine for women, offering advice on marriage, beauty, and how to please the ghost of your deceased suicide bomber husband. It is called Al-Shamikha (translated: The Majestic Woman), and its intent is to give Muslim women their own version of a Western women’s magazine. By… iterating their roles as remaining covered and submissive, marrying a mujahideen and raising their children to become one too. And also, the benefits of becoming a martyr for Islam. So, basically, 31 glossy pages of anti-woman/Islamic extremist propaganda printed in pink and purple. But also: staying inside and keeping your face covered prevents zits, ladies!

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Misleading Headline of the Day

Single Protein Could Be the Achilles Heel of All Men

by Max Eddy | 4:20 pm, March 3rd, 2011

The frighteningly prophetic vision of Y: The Last Man might be closer than we think.

A recent study of fruit flies, which are distressingly similar to humans in the way their genes operate, has shown that male flies use a special protein to make up for their lack of a second X chromosome. There are thousands of genes in the body that need to be regulated, and male flies need some way of multiplying their X chromosomes in order to do that.

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Misleading Headline of the Day

A First Look At Lois Lane?

by Jamie Frevele | 11:09 am, February 14th, 2011

Hehe. See what we did there?

Cleveland, Ohio is celebrating its native sons, Jerry Siegel and Joe Schuster, the creators of Superman, by naming streets after them. The original unveiling took place in 2009, but the signs have now been updated with the iconic Superman “S.”

(Siegel and Schuster Society via Bleeding Cool)

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