If you’ve ever wondered whether you’re truly as heartless as L. Frank Baum’s tin man, worry not! There is now a simple test: If you download and use BreakupText — the new iOS app for the truly, deeply lazy — unironically, you almost certainly do not have one.
As the iTunes page says: “Breaking up with someone? There’s an app for that. BreakupText makes it easier than ever to end things with your significant other. No more awkward conversations or phone calls. With BreakupText, you can end your relationship in just a few taps.”
Not shown: terms and conditions that preclude all whining and bitching about “nice guys” and the ever-present “friend zone.”
Once you tell the app to “Begin the end” (which is totally not ominous sounding at all), you just select whether you’re breaking up a with a serious or casual reltionship, if the reason is a loss in interest, finding someone else, or death by bear attack, and finally click “no” to the question of whether or not you have a soul.
On the off chance you actually are eaten by a bear, at least you now have a fast way to get the word out?
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