Bill Gates Has Invented Remote-Controlled Birth Control

Now, where's the button that turns Hobby Lobby off?

Recommended Videos

Not a fan of IUDs or other hormonal contraception options? Don’t worry, friends, the future of our fallopian tubes is bright! The Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation is currently experimenting with an incredible microchip that could be embedded into the body to provide convenient and reliable protection for far longer than any currently available hormonal birth control. Now if I can just keep track of where I put the remote…

According to the MIT Tech Review,MicroCHIPS,an organization sponsored by the Foundation,has been hard at work on the revolutionary implant for the past two years after being prompted by Bill Gates himself. The microchip would release a timed dosage of 30 micrograms of levonorgestrel daily when triggered by a battery inside the device.

Microchip users who decide to conceive will be able to use the remote to turn their protection on and off at will without seeing a physician, and doctors will be able to alter dosages remotely. The chip also offers protection for an impressive sixteen years–that’s eleven more years than any hormonal option on the market today. 

Gizmodo says the device could be available as soon as 2018 but first (thankfully) the team wants to develop a code strong enough to stop anyone but the birth control user from hitting the “baby make” button.

Potential ovary hackers, you are on notice: do not mess this up for me and my menses! In the meantime, science: maybe some more birth control options for testicle-havers, please?

(via Thunderchild7 on Flickr) Are you following The Mary Sue on Twitter, Facebook, Tumblr, Instagram, & Google +?


The Mary Sue is supported by our audience. When you purchase through links on our site, we may earn a small affiliate commission. Learn more
related content
Read Article Surprising No One, All 3,878 of Elon Musk’s Cybertrucks Are Being Recalled
Elon Musk during a T-Mobile and SpaceX event
Read Article ‘Mamma Mia!’ Star Sara Poyzer Says a BBC Production Replaced Her With AI
Sara Poyzer performs at the Magic at the Musicals event in 2019
Read Article In Moment of Unbelievable Irony, Midjourney Accuses Stability AI of Image Theft
Spider-Man pointing at another Spider-Man, who is pointing back.
Read Article Elon Musk May Be the Lesser of Two Evils in This Legal Battle With OpenAI
Elon Musk at the 2022 Met Gala
Read Article A.I. Scammers Are Impersonating Real Authors to Sell Fake Books
A robotic hand holds a pencil.
Related Content
Read Article Surprising No One, All 3,878 of Elon Musk’s Cybertrucks Are Being Recalled
Elon Musk during a T-Mobile and SpaceX event
Read Article ‘Mamma Mia!’ Star Sara Poyzer Says a BBC Production Replaced Her With AI
Sara Poyzer performs at the Magic at the Musicals event in 2019
Read Article In Moment of Unbelievable Irony, Midjourney Accuses Stability AI of Image Theft
Spider-Man pointing at another Spider-Man, who is pointing back.
Read Article Elon Musk May Be the Lesser of Two Evils in This Legal Battle With OpenAI
Elon Musk at the 2022 Met Gala
Read Article A.I. Scammers Are Impersonating Real Authors to Sell Fake Books
A robotic hand holds a pencil.
Author