If you give a moose a muffin, he will probably want some jam, but if you don’t invite a bear to a birthday party, he will devour all baked goods and cause extensive property damage. The Andrew W.K. of bears literally crashed a boy’s first birthday party in Alaska last Saturday, simultaneously capturing cupcakes as well as my heart.
The National Post reports that an 180-pound black bear was “shimmying” across the roof of Alicia Bishop and Glenn Merrill’s home when, according to Merrill, “I heard this cracking […] And the next thing you know, there’s this bear that, I mean, literally, fell right from [the skylight].”
Merrill said he and the bear stared at each other in confusion for a few seconds, until the bear, understandably, decided to help itself to snacks. According to Bishop their unexpected guest put “its paws up on the table and starts licking his [the birthday boy’s] birthday cupcakes, and I’m just like, `You’ve got to be kidding me.'”
The couple managed to shoo the bear out, but not before it tried one last time to score an invitation: “It was up by the window like, `I want more cupcakes.”‘
Unfortunately, as one might predict, this story does not have a happy ending for our hero. But it’s been an emotionally trying week for me, and since I suspect I’m not the only one, let’s not dwell on what can’t be undone.
I’ll choose to remember Cupcake Bear the way he would have wanted: sugar-sated, comatose, rocking a birthday hat, and partying down.
(image via Treasures and Tiaras Kids on Flickr)
Previously in bear-aking news
- The history of the teddy bear is surprisingly dark
- First brain surgery successfully performed on a bear
- Even Alaskan bears have webcams